glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Julie: Bag of Zombie Farts cotton candy!




From a Youtube documentary on the serial killer Joel Rifkin: Steve Louder works for the New York State Police?! What happens if he's SOFTER?! Hahaha!




From TAMAGOTCHI for the Game Boy: Remember to FLASH the toilet!

glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
Eric Ho called me this afternoon to say that there were changes afoot at work, so (of course) he couldn't guarantee he could come over later. I've had it with that, actually! The Canucks played the Flames tonight at 7, and lost 5-2.


From Not Always Right: Tanna Farley?! So do you tan all the time or are you a tanner?




From Not Always Right: David Willy?! DICK JOKE INCOMING.




From Not Always Right: Jonathon Flores?! That is not a good way to spell JONATHAN.




From Laid-Back Corner: Tiffany Maddux Pretty?! What if she'd turned out to be ugly?




From Not Always Right: Kelly Luper?! That just reminds me of lupus!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Julie S. and Fun Pics and Stuff: A turkey is in disguise as a flamingo, and his turkey friends are discussing this. "He's got a point. Nobody eats a flamingo on Thanksgiving."




From Not Always Friendly: Zack Wagoner?! So do you drag a wagon with you all the time?




From Not Always Right: Bex Alles?!




From Not Always Romantic: Cepheron Kalle?!

glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
It's International Coffee Day today! Johnny Canuck AKA Steffan D. added me to Facebook via the Fearsome Canucks group - NICE!


From Not Always Right: Brett Hospital?!




From Not Always Working: Kali James Ravel?!




From Not Always Right: Gemini Gold?!




From Not Always Right: Jourdan Townsend?! That's not how you spell JORDAN!




From Not Always Right: Beins Jared?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
I got a surprise birthday card from Pathways in the mail today - SWEET! :D


Julie S. saw this poop emoji birthday balloon at the store!




From Melissa: Eating poop ice cream from a toilet!




From Pete and Check This Out: A blue whale can make a fart bubble big enough to fit a horse in it. There. That's a thing you know now.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "Lord Galuf dropped a deuce in my toilet the other day, and I'm still working on plunging the thing."




At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "I swear he shit a whole moogle. Yeah, I'm pretty pissed off about it."




At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "So I don't mind depriving him of food for the time being."

glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
It's 8:01 PM (20:01 in 24-hour time) on September 11! YAY FOR TIME QUIRKINESS AND COINCIDENCES! :D


From Reddit on June 3, 2016: No, Faith, we do not give our official abusive exes "one last great kiss with tongue" when we're splitting our items post-breakup. You also have a gambling problem ($10,000 in debt to eBay?!) and addiction issues! While those can be fixed / resolved, I hope you never contact your ex again.




From Reddit on July 6, 2017: No, Worried19, cuckolding is not sexist or racist. I'm not a fan of fetishes, but you have some really weird opinions about gender and other things as well, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Not Always Working: Mirissa Sorensen?! Her parents should have known that MARISSA is always spelled with an A!




From Not Always Right: Mooshki Mitchell?! Reminds me of a cow... MOO!




From Not Always Working: Naoma Howard?! Shouldn't that be NAOMI?!




From Not Always Working: Nicole Barbee?! This is notable only because it reminds me of Barbie dolls and the Aqua song BARBIE GIRL!




From Not Always Right: Phoenix Gray?! This special snowflake also apparently goes by "they"... really?! Just pick HE or SHE like normal people! He or she goes by "they" - I don't think so!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
It's International Bacon Day today!


From Not Always Right: Elda Thórsdóttir?!




From Not Always Right: Erana Zeitler?!




From Not Always Working: Felis Dee?! I'd be tempted to type this as "Felix" every single time!




From Not Always Right: Frederika Maguire?!




From Not Always Working: Freydis Egilsdottir?! I can see Freya, but not Freydis. Krista also apparently knows this person... Also, DRAGON! :D

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Since I was up at 8 AM, it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


From THE NEW DETECTIVES: Scotland Williams?!




From Not Always Working: Björn Westling?! This is only notable because I will forever misread the last name as WRESTLING.




From Not Always Working: Brandon Greif?! This is only notable because I will forever misread the last name as GRIEF.




From Not Always Right: Cerise Gwendolynn Gardner?! At least Cerise is better than naming yourself Cherry...

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Julie S. found this ceramic KOVOT poop mug on Amazon! :D




From Not Always Right: Amanda Tootle?! Makes me think of farting!




From Not Always Right: Dayanara Ryelle?! I like the assonance of her name, so this is actually a cool one!




From Reddit in June 2017: Reality Winner?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Ask Ideas: Body, why didn't you tell me that this fart was going to be liquid?!




From Ask Ideas: Ted Cruz is thinking, "When you think you farted, but it's more than you bargained for..."




From Ask Ideas: Will Farrell in ELF is thinking, "When you fart, but it wasn't a fart..."

glowing_dragon: (Cherry Cheesecake or Pie)
From Baby's Named A Bad Bad Thing: Tangie Ambrose named her son Rock and her daughter Stone Love?! Rock and Stone?!




From Not Always Friendly: Apical Meristem?! She's also from CANNON BALL, North Dakota!




From Baby's Named A Bad Bad Thing: Darth Vader Williamson?! Of course this news story was published on STAR WARS DAY, May 4!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
I was up at 6:40 AM, so it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


From Julie S. and 9Gag: Shart Week! Even scarier than SHARK WEEK!




Frustrated with the toilet paper holder? Just cram it in there horizontally somehow!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Steph called me at noon to catch up. She'd tried calling me last week to say that she'd received the card I'd mailed for baby Henry, but I'd been sleeping! She said that Cecilia and Angela Mok had visited her and baby Henry, and so did Sandy's family. Thank goodness they didn't go with Michael for the baby's middle name (after Lisa's dad Mike), but went with Mike's middle name instead. Fraser apparently loves the animal book I got him, wanting Lisa to read it to him multiple times a day EVERY DAY (much to her chagrin), and is now recognizing and naming a lot of those animals by himself. He also likes baby Henry, wanting to kiss him a lot, which is good! Steph says that Hiero is "very naughty" when it comes to Mom, and apparently, he hit her the other day. Go, Hiero!

Apparently, Mom wants Steph to intervene in Ryan and Morgan's cancelled wedding - that's not her business, and she probably wouldn't want to, anyway! Fraser was at daycare right then (which is more interesting than being at home with just Steph and the baby), and Henry was making funny noises when he was waking up from a nap. I said hi to him and told him that I was his aunt, which apparently got no reaction, but that's okay since he's a baby. I also told Steph that Ayler now knows the word "vagina," and that our parents were indeed horrified when he said that at lunch! I can imagine him asking me whether I have one - oh dear. Imagine if he busts that word out at kindergarten when he starts school! Steph says that she and Lisa are thinking of coming here in November around Remembrance Day weekend, and that Lisa just transplanted her job over when they moved - good stuff!


From Janina: I found the G-spot in a parking garage, guys!




From Julie S. and Snapchat: A chili and rice BOWEL?! Fresh LAME juice?! Fresh LAME soda?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
These were cobbled together from two separate Youtube videos, as my MOTHER 3 game is saved already in Chapter 8 at the point of no return in New Pork City, so I can't go back to Argilla Pass in Chapter 7 to fight Negative Man again.


You encountered Negative Man!




Life is but a moment, a meaningless grain of sand )
glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Some older guy by the hospital said that my San Francisco shirt was a "nice shirt." Cool!


From Tyler A. and the Chive: Ramit Inmah Ashol?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Paul Twocock?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: This old lady named ORAL was on a game show?! I've heard of Opal, but ORAL is way too much!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Harry Sidebottom?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Crystal Coker?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF screenshot collage #1: Lenna to her father King Tycoon: "Off to the crack-house again?" Captain Faris: "I just dropped a load... in my pants..." Boco the Chocobo: "Yeah, you best be getting your fat ass off me, biatch!" Lenna to Bartz: "I supoose you'll want me to repay you with sexual favors..."

Lenna: "It's been fun, but I've really gotta go. There's probably a long line of hooligans at my corner..." Boco: "Damn it, Bartz... I hate you." Boco: "Man, honestly... Bartz is gay or something." Bartz: "Ahhh... Piss water!"




Version 0.21 is more offensive than Version 1.01! )
glowing_dragon: (Poop)
I was up at 8 AM today, so it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT! Then I lost a pair of underwear due to TMI reasons because I had to throw them out... SO DAMN STRESSFUL! :(


From Ask Ideas: The girl says, "You were right, Mom. The only way to know if it was a shart or a fart is to check." Her brother replies, "Looks like a shart, Tammy."




From Not Always Hopeless: Ares Zax?!




From Not Always Right: Annis Ashwell?! So... kind of like ANUS?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From my ex-friend Lucas's Discord: Someone flushed the PLEASE FLUSH sign down the toilet!




From Julie S. and Wish: Poop emoji socks!




From 2Day FM: "Why does toilet paper need a commercial? Who is not buying it?" I remember a toilet paper STORE that my family and I used to pass every time we went for lunch at the Louis Garden restaurant next door. Bonus: It used to be an adult video store.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Since I was up at 6:55 AM, it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


This baby says, "I farted and a little poop came out. So what?"




From Slimjet User Group: Hamza Yousfi?! His profile says he's from Tunisia, but I don't know if that's an actual legitimate Tunisian name!




From Not Always Right: Joseph Bark?! WOOF WOOF BOW WOW!




From Not Always Right: Emily Warning?! What if she's not around to give you a warning? Haha!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Ness, Paula, Jeff, Poo, and the Super Plush Teddy Bear finally make it to the Scarabi desert in MOTHER 2 DELUXE. By this grove of palm trees, Porky's stink still hangs in the air... you can see his poop pellets! EW!




From Not Always Working: Chatoyer T'heed Huggins?! Reminds me of Huggies diapers, hahaha!




From Not Always Right: Diamando May?!




From Not Always Right: Peter Pop Bumper?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Engrish.com: Your dog shit is not allowed here. Hell all your family.




From Julie: Unchi-kun Japanese lucky poop candy!




To all you vegetarians [AND VEGANS!] who give us carnivores crap for eating meat, I just wanted to let you know... my food poops on your food, so HA!!!!!! There's a pooping cow!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Ask Ideas: The "I'm Not Even Mad - That's Amazing" guy from ANCHORMAN says, "I just sharted my pants!"




From Ask Ideas: Eat chili peppers, they said. It will be fun, they said. FIERY FARTS! FIERY FARTING!




From Ask Ideas: This guy from ALONG CAME POLLY says, "Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted. I tried to fart, and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let's go."

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Vanessa and When summer starts, my life is instantly better: A baby onesie that says, "Ah, good sir. I do believe I've shat in my pantaloons." The onesie also features a mustache!




From Laid-Back Corner: 1975 Led Zeppelin vs. 2012 Nicki Minaj?! Led Zeppelin's THANK YOU wins over Nicki Minaj's song about a stupid hoe EVERY TIME!




From Julie: There's an Indycar driver named Will Power?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
Uncle Andrew's office called me at 10:55 this morning - yes, next Tuesday at 4 should work just fine for once for my next dentist appointment with Sean!


From Ripley's Believe It Or Not on May 13, 2015: Jay and Kateri Schwandt have 13 sons in a row! Tyler, Zach, Drew, Brandon, Tommy, Vinnie, Calvin, Gave, Wesley, Charlie, Luke, Tucker, and now Francisco!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Cyan, Edgar, Locke, and Celes are inside the FINAL FANTASY VI: THE ETERNAL CRYSTALS Magitek Research Facility in Vector. They pick up Toxic Sludge as treasure from the Proto Armor enemies inside. I was curious as to what this was, so I looked in the Items menu. It covers enemies with dragon waste?! HAHAHAHA, THAT IS AWESOME! :D




From Not Always Hopeless: This girl is named Friday Smith?!




From Not Always Working: Bergman Oswell?!




From Social Fixer Off-Topic: Bertil Gralvik?! Kind of reminds me of Gravol, haha.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
COFFEE TIME since I got up at 8 AM, plus very good poop timing! YAY!


From Ask Ideas: This black baby says, "Oh no! I think I just sharted!"




From Ask Ideas: 10 Guy thinks, "That moment you fart, and realized that you sharted..."




From Ask Ideas: Futurama Fry says, "Not sure if slow, warm fart or a diarrhea shart."

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
I experienced good #2 timing just now! :D


From Wesley: Poopy-Time Fun Shapes for your kids' bathroom time?! Do I want to know how this is supposed to work?! "Poopy Time Fun Shapes! It's about to get Poopy! Make bathroom time fun again with the original SafeGlide adapter and Poopy-Time shapes! What will your kids poop up?"




From Janina: Winning at MARIO KART: Princess Peach, Luigi, Toad, Yoshi, Wario, and more!




I got this captcha from EmuParadise while downloading FINAL FANTASY VI ADVANCE: Taco Tuesday!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Ask Ideas: This dog thinks, "When you don't know if you just sharted."




From Ask Ideas: This baby thinks, "That moment you realize... you pushed too hard."




From Ask Ideas: This baby thinks, "That moment when you realize it wasn't a fart..."

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Janina: Mrs. Slocombe from ARE YOU BEING SERVED!




From Julie S. and Snapchat: Popeye's Chicken is offering JALAPENIS chicken POOPERS?! Then there's an overpriced breakfast menu offering "delicious and SWETTY" items - EW!




From REAL STORIES: INSATIABLE HUNGER: Rody O'Reilly?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: Steve Bear is an Angeles National Forest ranger?!




From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: John Argue was trained as a lawyer?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
Sherry Norris wanted to add me to Facebook from the Puckheads - okay, then! Experienced the "whoosh-whoosh" in my ears again, too! Talked to Vanessa briefly on MSN when she asked about something... yeah, that's still going on. I was going to go out for a short while to visit Grandma and feed her some dinner... I unexpectedly saw my parents there, so they wanted to take me out for dinner AFTER we helped Harmony with the baby. At least I did feed Grandma some congee and her actual dinner of meat / veggies / mashed potatoes, and she thanked me for it mid-feed! She wanted to feed herself some dessert, so I let her do that while keeping an eye on her.

Of course, she asked me whether I wanted some food! As usual, I said no. Mom gave me some shoes and a bunch of mostly-old snacks from Grandma's room (Bugles / Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa medicine with an expiry date of 2002?! / shredded pork / cream wafers / shrimp crackers / Chinese egg rolls / strawberry jam) before we left to see the baby. She also let me invite Chinese Eric to Thanksgiving Dinner - I didn't tell her that I already had invited him during Monday's marathon phone call - and wondered if he'd like to help with Grandma, hahaha! I threw most of the stuff out except the Bugles, which were still good / non-aired out. Later, I got to hold the baby (who smiled and grabbed my finger) for a while before he got fussy - he wanted to look out the window, of course. He also apparently enjoyed bathtime, and HATED being taken out of the water since he cried A LOT! It was cold even inside, for sure.

Harmony says they got back from Portland today, and got really good at eating really fast since the baby had meltdowns every time they wanted to have dinner! The parents and I went to a Vietnamese place to have dinner - it used to be Sun Wong Kee, and I remember it well. After pork / chicken / lamb / shrimp / noodles, we went to see if Mom could find Neo-Citran at London Drugs since she was sick; luckily, she could! (Nicole couldn't last night!) I finally got home at 8:35 or so, to a rather perfidious email from Randal about how my tagging him resulted in "trivial" emails, and how it wouldn't matter if I unfriended him. FINE THEN, I'LL GRANT YOUR WISH! NO MORE HEALING FOR YOU! If you want to be unfriended that badly because you can't stand the emails you get when I tag you in pictures and other people comment on them, FINE! I will grant you your wish, you perfidious fucking asshole. At least others were nicer about it!


A funny MY BIBLE sign that Julie S. spotted: YOU CAN'T ENTER HEAVEN UNLESS JESUS ENTERS YOU! (so wrong...)

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