Deliberately leaving things around to trip on?! / Blocking people for fun?! NO!

May. 3rd, 2020 09:32 pm
glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
The kids called me at 6:45 to scream-sing a song about (as far as I can tell) licking bums or nicking bums, and asked me inappropriate questions about whether I'd like to see Jon peeing. No, thank you! Then Ayler asked if I would eat a whole pie (which Hiero said they were having for dessert) because of my "big stomach" - mmm, no, I'm not on MY 600-POUND LIFE! Harmony said that was their father's influence - yeah, I can TELL! I said hi to Beckett, who didn't really say anything. but that's okay. It was pretty brief because they just wanted to sing a song, which is fine. Life is as usual over there, I see! I joked that when social distancing is over, I'd buy a pie to throw at their dad just for all these "jokes."


From Reddit on April 23, 2019: No, PickWhatCar, deliberately leaving things for you to step on is NOT something you should laugh about. It's time to have a SERIOUS TALK with your boyfriend! What if you'd tripped over it and hurt yourself?!




From Reddit on May 14, 2019: No, "I'm blocking you" is not a silly game which should make you giggle. What if you have mobility issues like I do? I don't think you should LIKE being blocked on your way out of a room! For me, the blocking game would NOT be fun. You know I have shit to do and you're getting in my way for fun? Nope, you stay where you are. Besides, you deleted your Reddit account and I still have both of mine, so I WIN!

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GALACTIC GARBAGE STATION, my fourth Reddit silver, Let's Game It Out scenarios

Apr. 19th, 2020 11:05 pm
glowing_dragon: (Bert and Ernie)
Knorr Garlic Alfredo Fettuccine, the rest of my Classico Alfredo sauce, Jamieson zinc and garlic pills, sriracha sauce, chili flakes, and black pepper as lunch for National Garlic Day today!




An English translation of an amusing Chinese webnovel: GALACTIC GARBAGE STATION! Thanks, Hidden One!


From Julie: Let's Game It Out on Youtube! Weird video game scenarios!


Got my fourth Reddit silver on April 10, 2020 for correcting Ummah_Strong on his usage of "folx." That's not even a word, and should be FOLKS! Then there's "alot" vs. "a lot."

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May Chan, a dehumanizing used condom board, Walker's Oat Crackers, Jimbo leaving

Mar. 1st, 2020 06:43 pm
glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
Jimbo / Nate LEFT the SuperFriends Discord server - WHAT THE FUCK?! I went shopping at 2:05 on a 407 for on-sale NEW limited-edition pink packaging SpongeTowels paper towels, NEW London Naturals plant-based citrus detergent, Colgate MaxFresh toothpaste x2 (Clean Mint green / Cool Mint blue), Scrub Daddy, and on-sale Walkers Shortbread Highland Oat Crackers / Three-Seed Oat Crackers before getting home at 2:55 on another 407 prior to COFFEE TIME! May Chan unfriended me on Facebook, but whatever - she was just Gabriel's friend. The Canucks played Columbus today at 4, and lost 5-3 thanks to an empty-net goal AND four unanswered goals in the last eight minutes of the third period... thanks, new goalie Louie Domingue...


My NEWEST top-voted Reddit comment as of February 20, 2020: A used condom display on a public bulletin board IS disgusting and dehumanizing! 5313 points! :D Every time someone uses "body count" to describe their number of sex partners, I think: "HOW MANY PEOPLE DID YOU KILL?!?" because THAT is what "body count" really means! Millennials and zoomers, I swear...




NEW limited-edition pink packaging SpongeTowels paper towels!




NEW London Naturals plant-based citrus dish detergent or dish soap!




NEW London Naturals plant-based unscented FREE AND CLEAN dish detergent or dish soap!




Walkers Shortbread Highland Oat Crackers!




Walkers Shortbread Three-Seed Oat Crackers!




Colgate MaxFresh Clean Mint toothpaste!

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Vagina-having children?! WHAT THE HECK?! / Knorr Teriyaki Noodles Sidekicks!

Feb. 28th, 2020 08:12 pm
glowing_dragon: (Consumer Whore)
Since Chinese Eric confirmed that he is coming over tomorrow, I went to Shoppers at 5:15 on a 401 and bought President's Choice Smokey Bacon and Chive quiches, Reser's Main St. Bistro signature mashed potatoes, and President's Choice meat lasagna. $26 every few months isn't that bad, and I already have chips galore here! Got home at 6:05 on a 407, too!


From Reddit on October 13, 2019: No, BamSlamThankYouSir, we do not refer to children as "vagina-having children." Also, ALL women have vaginas!




Knorr Teriyaki Noodles Sidekicks!

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Egypt, Effort, Kunkletown, Aquashicola, and Little Gap?! / Third Reddit silver!

Feb. 20th, 2020 08:27 pm
glowing_dragon: (Cherry Cheesecake or Pie)
I discovered that Jason Oboril unfriended me on Facebook - whatever!


Julie M. was on vacation and saw this map at a Pennsylvania visitor centre: Egypt, Effort, Kunkletown (hahaha), Aquashicola (hahaha), and Little Gap?!




I got my third Reddit silver on January 24, 2020 for telling Vinnie9911 that he's the asshole for posting a huge wall of text and not including paragraphs in his OP!

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No Method soaps! / Second Reddit silver! / Keep Calm Canucks! / RooCop emote!

Feb. 19th, 2020 10:16 pm
glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
PRODUCT WARNING: NO MORE Method dish soaps! The pump doesn't work right, causing it to squirt all over the place!


Frozen Bao (from the Blood Games) finally unfriended me or deactivated his profile. The Canucks played Minnesota tonight at 7:30, and lost 4-3 in the shootout...


On December 29, 2019, I got a second Reddit silver award and plenty of imaginary Internet karma points by saying "Yum, sand!" in response to LemmeLaroo confusing DESERT with DESSERT!




From a Fearsome Canucks Fans member request: Keep Calm and Go Canucks!




From multiple Discord servers, Shiwa and V4F: RooCop emote!




From multiple Discord servers, Shiwa and V4F: RooCop emote, enlarged!

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WOMEN, not womxn! ARE YOU STUPID AND A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE?!

Dec. 28th, 2019 12:10 pm
Tags:

Toothbrush bristles are NOT Brussels! / Kids should be playing Nintendo games!

Nov. 28th, 2019 06:07 pm
glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
I was barely awake or coherent this morning, and snarked at a few people about their assumption that EVERYONE has Thanksgiving today. Also added Kate to Hangouts - she thought that Mike's email address was hilarious! Facebook was also down this morning, and now I can't seem to tag anyone! UGH!


From Reddit on June 8, 2019: No, TheOnlyChoco, we do not refer to toothbrush bristles as BRUSSELS. Are you five years old?!




Captain Strong lecturing Ness at the Onett police station in EARTHBOUND: "At times like this, kids like you should be playing Nintendo games."

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Word Counter Tool / 36 and 24 is a pretty major age gap! / Maranda Johnson?!

Nov. 22nd, 2019 06:58 pm
glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
Went to London Drugs at 3:15 on a 407 to get some cheaper Advent calendars x7, which I finally found in the form of on-sale $2 Windel Advent calendars. I'm not paying $9 for one, LINDT! I also got American Greetings Christmas stickers x5 (ornaments / cats / dogs / snowflakes / reindeer / winter), ten Scrub Daddy sponges, and 400 Mead index cards, getting home at 4:20 on a late 407. I also had to measure my duffle bags


Word Counter Tool since CharacterCountOnline.com is offline now for whatever reason. At least the annoying SEO Keyword Tool stuff is BELOW what I need! There was another Word Count Tool, but I don't care about the readability level of my blurbs right above the text box.


( Christmas stickers and duffel Tracker bags from Bentley! )


From r/relationship_advice on September 18, 2019: No, aliibe, 36 and 24 is not "literally almost a decade." It is in fact 12 years... MORE than a decade! Reminds me of these ditzy girls that my sister saw at the park once. "75 minutes?! That's, like, almost an hour!"

Also, throwawaypeen12345 is NOT making himself look good with the clickbait (he has no penis) OR trying to downplay the MAJOR age gap when he LEADS OFF with that…




From Reddit and r/vancouver: Maranda Johnson?! BAD SPELLING OF MIRANDA! Or is it like the FINAL FANTASY VI town?

Tags:

Brad Marchand getting two minutes for existing, NHL icon enlarged, 359 thumbs up

Oct. 11th, 2019 07:21 pm
glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
From Reddit and r/hockey: Brad Marchand gets a two-minute penalty for existing! Yes, definitely Photoshopped!




NHL icon, enlarged! In my fandom, slashing is a two-minute penalty.




New record for most thumbs-up on my Youtube comments: 359 on a Female Killers video on the Marie Robards case, uploaded on November 18, 2015! "Steve won't make it to church because he's closer to God than he imagined" - HAHAHAHA! She poisoned him with some stolen barium acetate. Now the video's been deleted?!

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173 CRIMINALLY LISTED birthday thumbs-up in 2017! / Sharmon Crawford Intili?!

Sep. 18th, 2019 06:12 pm
Tags:

Do NOT put someone's toothpaste on their toothbrush FOR them! That's just weird!

Jul. 9th, 2019 07:02 pm
glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
Managed to get removal for hearing at the nearby medical clinic at 10 AM - I knew something was wrong if I couldn't hear the new microwave beep when it finished! I got home at 10:30 after seeing Dr. Chong, which isn't too bad.


From Reddit on December 28, 2018: No, DontEatMyHotDog, we do NOT put someone's toothpaste on their toothbrush FOR them unless they physically can't do it. I'm sure he can do it himself, and it only saves five seconds! Also, nobody needs the condescending "exactly" at the end!

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Margarine, sponges, steel wool / VAGINA and DISCHARGE the noun ARE NOT VERBS!

Jun. 3rd, 2019 06:41 pm
glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
I managed to focus, and finished a few sub-projects recently! Left at 5:10 on a 401 (just managing to get the bus) to get some Meadowvale margarine / London Naturals foam scour sponges x4 / store brand steel wool (Spiral Scours) from London Drugs, and came home at 5:40 on a 407. BUS EFFICIENCY!


London Drugs extra-strong steel wool Spiral Scours, also available in gold!




London Naturals foam scour sponges!




From Reddit on February 5, 2019: No, OKRoom9, we do not preface our replies with "lmao" with a bunch of extra O letters in there for "flavor." Laughing my ass off off off off...??? We also do not use "discharging" as a verb in that way when you're talking about the NOUN of "discharge," nor do we use "vagina" as a verb in that way. Yes, verbing weirds language, BUT NOT IN THAT CONTEXT! How old are you, 12? Never mind that free bleeding is gross anyway...

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Dehydrated cow manure, poop emoji Beanie Babies, 195 thumbs up on Youtube!

Feb. 16th, 2019 06:52 pm
glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Julie M. and Snapchat: Now that's a crock of... Dehydrated Cow Manure!




From Candy: A poop emoji Beanie Baby toy with an Elvis pompadour?!




My most-liked Youtube comment has 195 thumbs-up? It was about my then-upcoming eye cataract surgery on January 10. Awesome! Matthew Santoro's The Most CHILLING Confessions on Record, uploaded on January 9, 2019.

Tags:

Dilbert avoiding co-workers, the Whistle, the Crown, Matoya's Crystal, the Herb

Nov. 29th, 2017 08:16 pm
glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
This DILBERT comic strip on introversion from May 10 is from Reddit. Tina: "Are you going to the department meeting?" Dilbert: "Yes, as soon as I plan my route. I have seven co-workers who I need to avoid on the way. Three are nonstop talkers. The other four ask me for something every time I see them. I've mapped their likely locations, and I'm working out an avoidance path. Yes, I think I can do it." Tina: "Is that my name on your list of employees to avoid?" Dilbert: "I didn't say it was a perfect system."




Crown: The stolen CROWN.




Crystal: A ball made of CRYSTAL.




In the FINAL FANTASY I DAWN OF SOULS version, Matoya's Crystal Eye is described as "A transparent orb of crystal."




Whistle from Princess Toadette: Beautiful music fills the air.




The SUPER MARIO FANTASY ADVENTURE party tries to use the Herb from Matoya. "Yuck! This medicine is too bitter!" Yeah, we should just leave that for the elven Prince of Elfland...

Tags:

Glow-in-the-dark boobs sign! / Dytazia?! / Occupying a venue! / Petula Dvorak?!

Nov. 16th, 2017 05:10 pm
glowing_dragon: (Consumer Whore)
From Mikki: I'm not sure what this warning sign is about, but it seems to include glow-in-the-dark boobs and a large swimming penis...




From Julie: Dytazia?!




From NZ Metal Army: "OCCUPY a fucking venue! Get your lazy fat ass to a gig!" This is the only #OCCUPY thing I understand. (except for the Cookie Monster one) Yay, humor!




From Reddit and r/morbidreality: Petula Dvorak?! Yes, I've heard of the singer Petula Clark, but this just reminds me of the word "petulant" and the composer Antonín Dvořák! {Antonin Dvorak}

Tags:

Attempts to sleep, finding God underwater, our current stats, Ass Glob Ring

Nov. 5th, 2017 06:02 pm
glowing_dragon: (Default)
I went out at 4 on a 407 to the Bay, but all their garbage cans were very expensive. It was off across the street to London Drugs: a big reusable bag, a replacement Sterilite garbage can, on-sale Moritz Icy Squares, on-sale Lindt Peppermint Cookie chocolate truffles, and Waterbridge Connoisseur brandy beans! Got home at 4:55 on a 407, which is MUCH better than last night!


Lindt Peppermint Cookie chocolate truffles!




From Amanda: The Googly Gooeys! Attempts to Sleep! On certain nights, it's so easy to fall asleep. However, on most nights... "3267, 3268, 3269, 3270 sheep..." "What's that noise?!" "Darn it. I think I'm hungry." "... but I don't want to brush my teeth again." "Fine. I'll go grab some cookies." "It's so dark and scary out here." "I'll watch TV until I fall asleep!" "I'm still not sleepy. What's wrong with me?" "This is it! I'm gonna try to sleep." "Grrr... when will my brain ever shut up?!"




The FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party has finally convinced Cid and Jacob to make their airship into a submarine. They find their Psychic Friend underwater just south of Karnak. "Congratulations, you have found God. Now, allow me to tell you something about yourselves. Yes or no."




Total Battles: 1468. Enemies Killed: 3101. Governments Ruined: 9. Treasure: 75% Total Saves: 257.




There's a ASS GLOB Ring in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF?!

Tags:

THE MANITOU / A shark-dressed man! / Stir-fried Wikipedia! / STRENGH? / Diasia?!

Jun. 17th, 2017 10:07 pm
glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
From Buzzfeed: THE MANITOU?!




From Janina: Every girl is crazy about a shark-dressed man at Super Bowl 2015.




From Engrish.com and Library of Most Controversial Files: This menu has stir-fried Wikipedia, stir-fried Wikipedia with pimientos, steamed eggs with Wikipedia...




When equipping Espers on the FINAL FANTASY VI: THE ETERNAL CRYSTALS characters, Ifrit gives Setzer "STRENGH +1" at level-up. What the heck is that, game?!




From Julie: Diasia sounds like a "posh" version of Daisy!

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Breathe Right Nasal Strips! / A non-Chinese Jenny Wong?! / I ain't even mad!

May. 18th, 2017 08:30 pm
glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
Due to MDSE (Monthly Drain Sleep Experience), I went to bed at 8:55 PM last night, and then slept for an additional two and a half hours today! I dreamed that I was on a family vacation where Dad refused to let me sort my laundry by color at home even though I was on my period. WTF, subconscious?!

There was a live EARTHBOUND race today at RPG Limit Break! :D


From Julie: Breathe Right Nasal Strips! Breathe Better and Dream Bigger! I'm not sure I'd want a seahorse, a giant hat, and a metallic deep sea shark monster showing up in MY dreams, random though they can be!




On DATELINE 2020, in "The Mystery of Apartment 410," there's a white person named JENNY WONG?!




From Janina and INGLORIOUS BASTARDS: I ain't even mad!

Tags:

Your boyfriend isn't a THEY or THEM! / You can't be technically 12 for anything!

May. 17th, 2017 11:56 am
glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
From Reddit on March 7, 2017: No, you should not encourage your BOYFRIEND in HIS using "they / them" pronouns! It's HE and HIM and HIS! I agree with Undoomed on this one. You are NOT that much of a special snowflake! Also, WTF is "eye gaze"? Just say "he looks at me for a long time"! This is definitely an example of semantic satiation!




From Reddit on April 3, 2017: No, you cannot be technically 12 when it's a month until your birthday! That would still make you your then-current age of ELEVEN.

Tags:

Menstrual CRAPS?! / Live Clean Exotic Nectar

Oct. 4th, 2012 04:50 pm
glowing_dragon: (Crazy-Eyed Bear)
Replied to Mandy's email this morning, which was good. When the Internet connection started going in and out, I resolved to play EARTHBOUND when I got home from London Drugs if it didn't resolve itself. Luckily, it was on again as soon as I got in! Got on-sale Mary's Organic Crackers, on-sale seaweed, 24 liquid gelcaps for a cold just in case, on-sale Excel cough drops / lozenges just in case (two for $2!), and Live Clean exotic nectar body lotion. The cranberry-pomegranate should be good!


Looked at the London Drugs website for sale stuff just in case I get sick, and found "menstrual craps" - HAHAHAHA! Funny typo!

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