glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
From James: Well, I'm sold. HOW TO SLEEP is the best fucking book ever! Being me, I had to edit a comma in with MS Paint.




From the comments on a Nav photo on Feb. 4, 2019: "Nice" should NOT be spelled as NYC! I know typing on mobile is a pain in the ass, but that's a simple word which comes up on your suggestions! NYC makes me think of New York City! Navjot, Vishal, and Gagan are stupid!




From the comments on a Nav photo on Feb. 4, 2019: Mandeep Singh?! I know Mandeep is a legitimate Indian name, but I just go to sex immaturity with that one!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
From Julie and DANCE MOMS: Joanne is fine, but Gianina?! Choose between Gianna, Gina, or Nina!




From Julie and DANCE MOMS: Ashley is fine, but Pressley?! BAD SPELLING OF PRESLEY! Especially if it'll be pronounced the exact same way...




From Julie: Mod Sun?!




From Michelle S. and her friend Cindy Cameron: A. Purdy Outhouse?! Yum, expensive Purdy's chocolates!

glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
I was barely awake or coherent this morning, and snarked at a few people about their assumption that EVERYONE has Thanksgiving today. Also added Kate to Hangouts - she thought that Mike's email address was hilarious! Facebook was also down this morning, and now I can't seem to tag anyone! UGH!


From Reddit on June 8, 2019: No, TheOnlyChoco, we do not refer to toothbrush bristles as BRUSSELS. Are you five years old?!




Captain Strong lecturing Ness at the Onett police station in EARTHBOUND: "At times like this, kids like you should be playing Nintendo games."

glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
COFFEE TIME! Do not join the r/Canucks Discord server! The mods and admins are all immature teenagers who think that I, a grown woman, am "disrespecting them" by posting a VERY sanitized rant about people who "need" Reddit reminders about the two 10 AM games this weekend. Just set an alarm, dude... no need to post something that reveals your terrible sleep habits. Even I manage not to sleep in past 10 these days unless I'm sick. I don't need a bot warning me about morbidity and "disrespect" because most of the things they post (including shitposts and memes) make me roll my eyes! The Canucks played New Jersey today at 10 AM, and lost 1-0. Thanks, Mackenzie Blackwood AND really early scheduling...


Hell, Michigan?!




Names banned in Sonora, Mexico, which borders Arizona: Burger King, Rambo, Facebook, Twitter, Robocop, James Bond, Harry Potter, Christmas Day, Rolling Stone, Virgin, Cesarean, Circumcision, Yahoo, Pocahontas, Spinach, Rocky, Mistress, US Navy, Terminator, Hitler, Lady Di, Email, Scrotum, Hermione, Batman, Private, Sponsorship, Traffic, Martian, Panties, and Illuminated?!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
From Discord on August 15, 2019: OMW is a pretty stupid and lazy abbreviation - just spell out ON MY WAY! You could do that for EXCITED and ANNIVERSARY! Also, nobody cares about your anniversary gift to your husband: cotton socks with pets on them.




In the big Corelle bowl, we have hot and sour soup noodles!




All-Chinese package of Knorr hot and sour soup mix!




From Not Always Right: FACEPALM! Crap... wrong hand... SHUNK!

glowing_dragon: (French Toast)
From Julie M. and Laugh or Leave: Being an old-timey doctor would rule. You'd be just drunk as hell, giving advice like: "Yeah, you got ghosts in your blood. You should do cocaine about it."




From Julie M. and Lmao Mommy: If I'm ever murdered or kidnapped, please don't make up lies about me. I do not light up a room. Everyone doesn't want to be my friend. People don't automatically take notice of me. I have a smart mouth and two friends. Tell 20/20 that.




From Julie M. and WZZO: How did you hear about the YMCA? Why was the Village People not an option?

glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
Chrystal emailed me this morning to say that she'll actually be out of town for the next two weeks and would love to meet up with me after getting back on the 20th, so that still totally works for me even if she understandably can't do the 14th! Vanessa came by from Langley before her Richmond appointments so we could exchange stuff. I gave her a Christmas card / Eric Ho's Jersey Milk chocolate bar / Advent calendar so I could get some of her homemade chocolate peanut Eat More bars since she can't have too much sugar these days. She got here at 12:20, and we spent half an hour chatting because I got back in at 12:50. Talked about Jason, his mom, his cousin, amniotic fluid, karma, Jon and Harmony's current living situation, Ayler, the stigma around girls, Krista thinking that everyone is out to get her / ignoring the signs of abuse from her exes Andrew and Ryan (DON'T WAIT AROUND FOR THEM TO CHANGE EVEN IF THEY WANT TO!), autism, a Steveston mail truck not looking out for her, that Eastern Conference hockey chat, Jimmy and his "must not be fatter than me" dealbreaker, (water) weight, January plans, maternity leave, Richmond drivers, my periods, her NOT making any more Thanksgiving dinners for SOME PEOPLE, and it being cold today. Good to catch up at least!


From Reddit on June 25, 2016: "We've been dating for a long time - FOUR MONTHS!" Oh, 19-year-olds... Sarcasam_Is_King can't even spell "sarcasm" correctly!




From Reddit on March 18, 2016: When people use expressions like "you go, girl" to her, WandMirk probably shouldn't take it so personally. She says she's not a girl even if her body doesn't produce most hormones. It says something that I misread her username as WANDA MIRK. Special snowflake right there! Not because of her body, but because of how she reacts to a normal expression.

glowing_dragon: (Default)
I got a baby intro photo card from Steph and Lisa in the mail for baby Henry - very nice! I'm not going to comment on the spelling of "shenanigans," though! Steph said that Shaun did comment on it, haha!


From Julie S. and Funnyjunk: I deal with my problems by painting over the squares on my Rubik's Cube!




Josh S. posted this: Instructions for waking a baby! Gentle kisses = YES! Airhorn = NO!




From George Takei: BEFORE! B-E-F-O-R-E! Not B4. We speak English, not bingo.

glowing_dragon: (Bubble Tea)



"You Are Balanced"




You're the type who likes everything in moderation, and you're especially good at balancing out life's extremes.
You are a bit of a novelty seeker, and you like to have a really good mix of things in your life. There is always room for something or someone new.

You meld well with many different types of people, and you can bridge the gap in groups where members have little in common.
You don't take anything in life too personally and seriously. If you have a bad day or week, you know things will eventually even out.







From Reddit on July 27, 2017: Stop whining, StripedPinkBoxers. "The phrase "girl crush" upholds heteronormativity in such an unnecessary way!" I personally don't think so. I'm cool if you're LGBT, but you have to realize that heterosexuality (and monogamy) is the assumed default for society! In the past, she's even tried challenging me on what I'd think if Nephew #4 was in fact a girl. Nice try, but I'd treat a nephew and a niece the same basic way! I'm also definitely not a fan of people abbreviating "THOUGH" as "tho." Also, LegsForAboutAnHour is a prostitute who got raped.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF screenshot collage #1: Lenna to her father King Tycoon: "Off to the crack-house again?" Captain Faris: "I just dropped a load... in my pants..." Boco the Chocobo: "Yeah, you best be getting your fat ass off me, biatch!" Lenna to Bartz: "I supoose you'll want me to repay you with sexual favors..."

Lenna: "It's been fun, but I've really gotta go. There's probably a long line of hooligans at my corner..." Boco: "Damn it, Bartz... I hate you." Boco: "Man, honestly... Bartz is gay or something." Bartz: "Ahhh... Piss water!"




Version 0.21 is more offensive than Version 1.01! )

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