glowing_dragon | Entries tagged with why

The kids called me at 6:45 to scream-sing a song about (as far as I can tell) licking bums or nicking bums, and asked me inappropriate questions about whether I'd like to see Jon peeing. No, thank you! Then Ayler asked if I would eat a whole pie (which Hiero said they were having for dessert) because of my "big stomach" - mmm, no, I'm not on MY 600-POUND LIFE! Harmony said that was their father's influence - yeah, I can TELL! I said hi to Beckett, who didn't really say anything. but that's okay. It was pretty brief because they just wanted to sing a song, which is fine. Life is as usual over there, I see! I joked that when social distancing is over, I'd buy a pie to throw at their dad just for all these "jokes."

From Reddit on April 23, 2019: No, PickWhatCar, deliberately leaving things for you to step on is NOT something you should laugh about. It's time to have a SERIOUS TALK with your boyfriend! What if you'd tripped over it and hurt yourself?!

From Reddit on May 14, 2019: No, "I'm blocking you" is not a silly game which should make you giggle. What if you have mobility issues like I do? I don't think you should LIKE being blocked on your way out of a room! For me, the blocking game would NOT be fun. You know I have shit to do and you're getting in my way for fun? Nope, you stay where you are. Besides, you deleted your Reddit account and I still have both of mine, so I WIN!

Current Mood: quixotic
Current Location: home
Current Music: Live, "Heaven"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/4027213.html

It's Earth Day 2020 today! I also temporarily got QUADRUPLE DIGITS IN MY BANK ACCOUNT again! Hopefully, my spending habits are a little better than they were the LAST time this happened! Also, I won't need to give $900 of my own money for a family trip like the ICBC insurance settlement. Of course, that only lasted for the time it took me to go banking, never mind grocery shopping! I think I'll just continue my usual money habits this time.

After dealing with a stupid Reddit Vancouver troll, I went banking and shopping at 11:25 AM on a 407 with my Asian old lady shopping cart, noting that the 414 shuttle bus would be discontinued next week as per a sign at the bus stop. Briefly peeked into London Drugs, and at least I didn't have to walk all the way around the block from Moore's clothing store to get to Royal Bank this time, unlike LAST payday! I got NEW Iogo cherry yogurt, NEW on-sale Oikos strawberry-raspberry / Zesty lemon-lime Greek yogurts x2, NEW Lysol Click Gel toilet bowl cleaner x3 (SPRING WATERFALL!) which was really easy for me to unwrap and apply, on-sale Earth's Own original almond milk, a NEW on-sale Tao Kae Noi BIG SPICY SEAWEED ROLL box with nine of them, chocolate orange Jaffa Cakes, and Shin Ramyun Black CUP noodles x2.

Also purchased NEW Western Family regular grated Parmesan cheese (green), NEW Western Family light grated Parmesan cheese (yellow), NEW Pulmuone Katsuo Soba Ramen noodles, NEW Ottogi Super-Spicy Yeul Ramen noodles, NEW Ottogi sesame ramen noodles with an egg block, Western Family mixed frozen vegetables AFTER TWO MONTHS, and a LUCKY 24-pack of Purex toilet paper. When I got home at 2:15 on a 407 with a nice friendly understanding bus driver, I paid my Shaw and hydro bills online. after text exchanges with both Erics about life, I went out again at 7:05 and luckily got another 12-pack of Purex double rolls along with some Old Dutch Restaurante salsa con queso (cheese salsa) and a big bag of Western Family mixed frozen vegetables for more peace of mind.

I also got Green Works toilet bowl cleaner x2 since I can just turn the cap and not have to squeeze it in impossible or difficult positions like I have to do with Lysol or Scrubbing Bubbles. London Drugs also has this, and I forgot about this till now. Got home at 8:10 on a 407 and tested out the Starfrit jar opener on the salsa jar. I hit the jar on the counter first to hopefully break the seal, tried opening it a few times, then I made a mistake by tilting the jar.... I think after that spill, I'll postpone a shower and laundry till at least tomorrow!

Hungry Man Boneless Fried Chicken microwaveable meal... YAY!

[( Smoking Backyard Barbecue! )

Current Mood: cynical
Current Location: home
Current Music: GWAR, "Gor-Gor"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/4023084.html

It's MARIO DAY today! :D

From Julie and 22 Words: Lord, no! Hey, we all love a comfortable toilet seat, so the idea of using a toilet cover shouldn't be so shocking. But this... this is an affront to all that is good in the world.

If that's a fuzzy blue toilet seat cover, I actually used to have one! When people were over at my place for a Fellowship prayer meeting in 2002, Joe asked whether he could use the washroom... of course! Afterwards, he came out and said: "Speaking as a guy, it's really hard to use your toilet!" Everyone else present wanted to know why, so he told us that it was the fuzzy blue toilet seat cover... holding it up while peeing created the potential for danger. Maxine's pantomime of a guy using my toilet was hilarious! :D

From Amanda: Coronavirus symptoms do NOT include shitting yourself, so there's no need to panic-buy toilet paper!

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Soul Asylum, "Cool"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/4004440.html

I had to spend MORE time out and MORE MONEY today at Richmond Centre because of ANOTHER temporary water shutoff. *rolleyes* Good thing I had plenty of cash! I bought a White Spot breakfast quesadilla with chorizo sausage, a White Spot blueberry milkshake that slightly tasted like cough syrup (what are they doing with those machines overnight?!), NEW on-sale OGX Beauty tea tree / mint shampoo and conditioner, on-sale Dove pomegranate shampoo and conditioner from $8.99 to $2.99, NEW Life iron pill supplements, NEW Jamieson Vitamins garlic softgels, and NEW Irish Spring charcoal body wash. Shoppers and London Drugs both worked! Got home at 5:40 on a 407 (was NOT going to call Hester because of the one-word and hangup I received LAST YEAR), and the water was back on, so I could take a shower for tomorrow!

Speeda E. Bump tombstone?!

( Alcohol and milkshakes at 9 AM, Christmas at Shiny Tea, quirkiness )

Current Mood: full
Current Location: home
Current Music: Bon Jovi, "Billy"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3998728.html

I discovered that Jason Oboril unfriended me on Facebook - whatever!

Julie M. was on vacation and saw this map at a Pennsylvania visitor centre: Egypt, Effort, Kunkletown (hahaha), Aquashicola (hahaha), and Little Gap?!

I got my third Reddit silver on January 24, 2020 for telling Vinnie9911 that he's the asshole for posting a huge wall of text and not including paragraphs in his OP!

Current Mood: quixotic
Current Location: home
Current Music: AC/DC, "Highway To Hell"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3997159.html

PRODUCT WARNING: NO MORE Method dish soaps! The pump doesn't work right, causing it to squirt all over the place!

Frozen Bao (from the Blood Games) finally unfriended me or deactivated his profile. The Canucks played Minnesota tonight at 7:30, and lost 4-3 in the shootout...

On December 29, 2019, I got a second Reddit silver award and plenty of imaginary Internet karma points by saying "Yum, sand!" in response to LemmeLaroo confusing DESERT with DESSERT!

From a Fearsome Canucks Fans member request: Keep Calm and Go Canucks!

From multiple Discord servers, Shiwa and V4F: RooCop emote!

From multiple Discord servers, Shiwa and V4F: RooCop emote, enlarged!

Current Mood: uncomfortable
Current Location: home
Current Music: GWAR, "Have You Seen Me?"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3996705.html

I went out just now, and it's started snowing and accumulating already!

Elmo: Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time.

GIF VERSION!

Snow on January 12! I took this photo just now.

Current Mood: cold
Current Location: home
Current Music: Foo Fighters, "Doll"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3983249.html

HAPPY NEW YEAR AND 2020, EVERYONE! NEW YEAR, NEW DECADE!

FINALLY HOME AFTER A FLIGHT! I left the house with Steph after thumping my suitcase up the stairs from the guestroom, hugged the kids, and Steph noticed Havarti was sad because she knows what a suitcase means. We drove 45 minutes to the airport; why WOULD she take a $20 or $30 toll road to save one minute?! I hugged her goodbye, then got selected for a pat-down because I accidentally left my phone in my pocket. UGH! At least a kind employee got me a zoomer to go all the way to my YYZ gate after the elevator! The flight itself was uneventful - I was seated in front with the babies and children, but played with my new friend, the year-old baby boy next to me.

White Eric picked me up as advertised after I landed at 2 today. Wow, time change! Haha. I had to walk the length and breadth of YVR because the outside exit for domestic arrivals was all the way at the front. Sweating for sure! I was home by 3, and everything seemed okay, but THE MICE MANAGED TO CHEW THROUGH THE STEEL WOOL IN THE BATHROOM?! YUCK!

At 12 AM the night before New Year's Eve, it will be Ramones time. It will be 2020, 24 hours to go. I wanna be sedated!

From The Onett Times: Happy Blue Year!

From Not Always Right: Dilbert says, "I have now officially lost all faith in human intelligence."

Quandae Shanoah Stewart?!

( ONTARIO TRIP! )

Current Mood: exhausted
Current Location: finally home!
Current Music: U2, "New Year's Day"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3979288.html

DIRTY JOKES!

How is pubic hair like parsley? You push it to the side before you start eating.

( Dirty jokes from Red's Twitch stream! )

After DOUBLE COFFEE TIME, I went out at 6:55 on a 401 to meet Chrystal at the Broadway London Drugs. Good thing I left early since the next Waterfront train was out of service at what HAD BEEN a surprisingly empty Brighouse Station! There was some guy clapping like a seal on the bus and at the station - thank goodness he wasn't in my train car! I got to London Drugs at 7:30, and was happy that there was no lineup at the post office so I could mail Corey and Julie's cards. However, I got a postal worker who was grumpy as fuck: I have NEVER been told that I shouldn't write anything in the corner of the envelope, otherwise the stamp would obscure the destination address! Fuck you, random guy!

Chrystal and I went to Pho Extreme Xe Lua: #17 and #1 it was! SPECIAL! We talked about her nephews Ethan (4) and Ethan (1 and a bit), Ayler, Hiero, Beckett discovering new words and the door, Beckett being "smart" by banging his head on the hardwood floor to delay Harmony's leaving for a school meeting, Beckett being really smart by putting all his molecule balls on the far windowsill so he can play with those and look at the reflected lights across the street at the same time (I left him to do that for a minute - he's fine and preoccupied), my broken suitcase, my replacement suitcase, my upcoming trip, and her just doing family things at home this holiday season. Angus and Melia and Phil and Grace have their own families now, and it would be pretty huge to have a family gathering! I got home at 9:05 on a 407, which is pretty good for leaving at 8:30. (Chrystal bused home again!)

Pho Xe Lua # 17 with Chrystal as a pre-Xmas 2019 dinner: Steak, flank, tendon, tripe, and fatty flank!

Right after Halloween, I was ChristmasFlamHam in Shiwa's Discord server!

From Tommy Chong: What's Your Stoner Elf Name? Mine is Smokey Jingletokes! Mike would be Buddy Evergreens! My ex-friend Jimmy would be Danky Sparklepipe!

Borked Heys suitcase which came with a busted zipper and an almost-impossible push handle...

Successfully packed replacement carry-on American Tourister suitcase with enough room for ALL my stuff, a working zipper, and a much simpler non-push handle! Way easier to maneuver on transit, too! My parents should have just lent me this one in the first place, then I wouldn't have had to store the first one in a weird way so I wouldn't have had to push the handle down every time I wanted to access it. *rolleyes*

Current Mood: full
Current Location: home
Current Music: Rolling Stones, "Brown Sugar"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3973131.html

I showered and did some MORE laundry today because my sweatshirts seemed to smell like mildew from last week (EW!), so I bunged some white vinegar in my washing load after looking remedies up online. Damn, I really hope that solves the problem!

From Youtube: Tanzania Morris?! Bonus: One of the other roommates was named SHASTA.

( More bad black names! )

Current Mood: hopeful
Current Location: home
Current Music: Blind Melon, "Hell"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3966597.html

John Walsh does good work, but why did he have to name his son Callahan Walsh?!

Reymundo Mundo?!

From TSN: Kawhi Leonard?! ALMOST sounds like coffee… or a crow going CAW! CAW!

From Julie M. and Only in Canada Memes: Poutine Pizza! Just in case you were bored of having unclogged arteries.

From Vanessa, A Website You Will Never Go To, and Kevin Crossan: Here's one way to remember how to install the new toilet paper roll. Beards are cool. Mullets are bad.

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Days of the New, "Solitude"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3953268.html

Today is Thanksgiving 2019, and I showered today! Nate from the r/Canucks Discord server blocked me because apparently I was going to bring up that autistic 14-year-old's following him to his house no matter how he felt about it. Yes, of course I will because IT'S DANGEROUS, you freshly-minted 19-year-old who thinks you're hot shit! You're NOT, and I think that YOU'RE the bitch and the dipshit. He should always bring up the kid's dangerous actions, even if it makes him upset and even if it happened months ago.

Ionosphere Torres?!

From Candy and Rage Girl: Some people should be dipped in Vagisil; then maybe they wouldn't be such irritating twats.

From Julie: Juan the Merry Mexican says, "Why did the Mexican take Xanax? For Hispanic attacks!" HAHAHAHA!

From James: Snoopy and Woodstock eating turkey on Thanksgiving! Is Woodstock engaging in cannibalism? A bird eating a bird!

Current Mood: enraged
Current Location: home
Current Music: Green Day, "Burnout"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3948614.html

After SHOWER TIME, I went to see Rishu at Touchstone at 2 today. Thank goodness that she was understanding about yesterday and was able to get me in today because of a cancellation! I browsed Richmond Public Market for a while - no food was appealing. Went to London Drugs for NEW Dare Foods Cookie Butter cookies, NEW Watermelon and Lime Tictacs Mixers, Arm and Hammer toothpaste, a pack of six grey MARTEX cloths, store brand scour pads, 2000 Flushes with chlorine, Secret socks, and on-sale Swiss Cheese crackers. I also mailed Fraser's birthday card and stickers for $2, but forgot to address the envelope before leaving the house. LUCKILY, I had my notebook handy! I finally got home at 4:40 on a LATE 407!

2000 Flushes Blue plus Bleach!

( Crackers and cookies! Egypt and jerks! )

Current Mood: creative
Current Location: home
Current Music: Creed, "Rain"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3924258.html

I discovered redrum today - UGH!

From my ex-friend Jimmy: YES! WWE GIF!

From Julie: Tralisa?!

( Mmm, soup! )

Current Mood: blah
Current Location: home
Current Music: Midnight Oil, "Pictures"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3913684.html

From Julie: WORLD OF WARCRAFT has a poop-themed quest about killing Pridewing Wyvern dragons!

From Reddit: Natalee Holloway and Stephany Flores Ramirez?! BAD SPELLING OF NATALIE AND STEPHANIE! Guess the killer Joran van der Sloot had a type...

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Soul Asylum, "Friends"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3911963.html

Had sesame seed bagels with cream cheese, coffee, kiwi fruit, and pears for breakfast today. Deb opted to keep Elysse at home this morning, so we went to Costco after I checked on my place and grabbed a couple of things, including Alice's FARTING ANIMALS coloring book. I even asked if I could do some laundry, and Deb said I could after she was done with five loads of laundry herself. Deb ended up buying DRUMSTICKS ice cream, Build-Your-Own-Taco kits, Liberté honey yogurt with a certain amount of milk fat for her mom ("it's not on sale, but it's my mom!"), fruit, rotisserie chicken, quinoa salad, compost bags, chocolate muffins, apple muffins, Two-Bite Brownies, and many other things.

Lunch: French bread, Brie cheese, DanActive yogurt drink, edamame beans, and Costco rotisserie chicken. Finished my laundry and was relieved to have that done so I won't have to do two loads of laundry right away when I get home tomorrow. We had fried rice with chili pepper and fish sauce, plus edamame beans on the side for dinner. Later, I entertained Declan and Elysse with the FARTING ANIMALS coloring book ("OH MY GOD!") - HAHAHA!

From Youtube: Yleen Kennedy?! BAD SPELLING OF EILEEN! Apparently, it's pronounced "Why-leen" like Auntie Wylene the drawing teacher... WHAT THE?! One of the reporters' names is St. John Barned-Smith?! Sounds like a St. Bernard dog...

From UNSOLVED MYSTERIES: Kimberli A. Martin works at Ripley's Believe It Or Not?! BAD SPELLING of Kimberly!

Current Mood: geeky
Current Location: Timberwood Village
Current Music: the Clash, "Lost In The Supermarket"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3897132.html

Chinese Eric called me at 11:50 to ask if I got his voicemail yesterday. No, since I never check that or the answering machine. He wanted to know if he could come over on Saturday since there's NO WORK and watch a lot of hockey: almost two games' worth, including the Canucks-Stars game. That sounds fine to me! I will have the parking pass, bottled water, the Lindt caramel Easter eggs, Lindt Blueberries and Cream / Strawberries and Cream / Milk and White Spring Edition chocolate truffles, the Russell Stover praline chocolates assortment, the Laura Secord peanut-free chocolate assortment, and the Kit-Kat Senses hazelnut chocolate assortment in a huge Ziploc bag (plus smaller ones as appropriate) ready for him. That is in a Price Smart plastic bag since I also had Ferrero Rocher hazelnut Easter eggs and Easter Egg Oreo cookies for him. Yes, of course we can have Deb's frozen Great Value All-Beef meat lasagna from APPRECIATE A DRAGON DAY for dinner, plus a lot of snacks!

From Julie M. and CHEATERS: Neshia Lincoln, pronounced like KNEE-Sha?! Not Neh-Shee-Ah or Knee-She-Ah?!

From Reddit: Two $8.99 grape Tylenol drop boxes are NOT on sale when they're two for $19, Shoppers....

Current Mood: excited
Current Location: home
Current Music: Live, "Top"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3882300.html

COFFEE TIME! The Canucks played the Stars at 4 today... the game went into overtime and a shootout after Vancouver gave up ANOTHER 2-0 lead. At least the Canucks WON 3-2 this time!

A leprechaun with green beer and four-leaf clovers: Happy St. Patrick's Day!

From FML: Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML. (THIS is why Andrew M. should NOT use airhorns!)

From Julie: Kiss me, I'm Highrish! Nice green T-shirt for St. Patrick's Day or 420!

Current Mood: relieved
Current Location: home
Current Music: Tech Support Comedy, "Super"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3877506.html

It's MARIO DAY today! I had to leave really early after DOUBLE COFFEE TIME because I had to walk to Brighouse station - thanks, endless sewer upgrades and construction! I had the on-sale Lindt chocolate bars (Caramel and Sea Salt / Lime Zest) for Harmony's EARLY family birthday dinner at Como Taperia! (early in more ways than one...) Jimmy was also bothering me about intimate hair details and wanting to "have fun" on his birthday when he KNEW I had things to do before I left at a certain time. NO MEANS NO! Fuck him! I killed time by purchasing a replacement red sweatshirt at H and M, where I also saw a DRAGON HOODIE! :D

We had a bunch of seafood and tapas (octopus / garlic and bread soup / (mashed) potatoes / eggs) while baby Beckett screamed happily at me (rivaling the restaurant's 80s music), Ayler wanted to check the weather everywhere, and Hiero liked constructing Cheerio towers through his toothpicks. After dinner, Hiero said he wasn't tired despite losing an hour of sleep - good for you! I AM! Mom said she had to pay more money to prevent me from accessing data, and that the dinner was $168; if you think I feel guilty about that, YOU'RE WRONG! Then we had to go to Auntie Eva's to drop something off before the parental trip to Hong Kong to see Great-Aunt and cruise around. At least they'll be away from Wednesday to the end of March! I finally got home at 6:45!

Random stuff from Mom and Dad: A black buttoned Louben jacket, a light blue Vancouver 2010 zippered jacket, an orange Top Shop sleeveless vest. preserved Young Coconut cookies, a blue buttoned jacket, a white Monument sweater vest, and a reddish-purple London Fog winter coat.

Red sweatshirt:

DRAGON HOODIE!

Cher: You're not turning back time this weekend. You're springing ahead, morons. Cher this!

From Geek Flag: Why all the hatred towards necromancers? Can't a guy just raise a family in peace?

Current Mood: sleepy
Current Location: home
Current Music: the Cure, "Wrong Number"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3874621.html

From Sara H. and Tumblr: Things that English speakers know about English word order, but don't know we know! I definitely sent this to Corey on Discord as soon as I saw it posted on my wall on Facebook!

BurntCopper posts a photo. "Adjectives in English absolutely have to be in this order: Opinion-size-age-shape-color-origin-material-purpose Noun. So you can have a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife. But if you mess with that word order in the slightest, you'll sound like a maniac. It's an odd thing that every English speaker uses that list, but almost none of us could write it out. And as size comes before color, green great dragons can't exist."

WindyCityTeacher: "Whoa! What?!"

Ice-Light-Red: "That is profound. I noticed this by accident when asked about adjectives by a Japanese student. She translated something from Japanese like BROWN BIG CAT, and I corrected her. When she asked me why, I bluescreened."

Current Mood: content
Current Location: home
Current Music: Metallica, "Nothing Else Matters"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3869800.html

I showered and did laundry today. The Canucks played San Jose at 7 tonight, and lost 7-2.

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Sunshine?!

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Ozias?! Apparently, it's a variant on King Uzziah of the Bible. Come on, people - there has to be a middle ground between that and (let's say) King David!

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Borden is a boy name?! She thinks of the Borden Cheese Company, while I think of Lizzie Borden! Also, the dude kind of looks like Jeffrey Dahmer from this angle... o_O

Current Mood: exanimate
Current Location: home
Current Music: the Ramones, "Animal Boy"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3864955.html

The Canucks played the Flames at 7 tonight, and won 4-3 in a shootout!

EDIT: Kate left a post on my Facebook wall asking if I wanted to three-way call with Pothead Mike; OF COURSE I DID! I sent her my number and we were on a roll after that. Mike said it was good to hear my voice, and we talked about Scary Mysteries / Damarys (Mike's impressed with how I'm dealing with it) / the weather where we were / kids swearing / Ed Kemper / Ed Gein / Jackie / 99fruitbat / uploads / the Surrey transit cop shooting / the RCMP tank / how Kate and I did not say "ABOOT." That was pretty good!

From Julie: Princeton?!

From Julie: Jalecia?!

From Julie: NARD?!

From Julie: Bebe?!

From Julie M. and the comic Chicken Thoughts and Baby Chicken: A dinosaur can bite its prey and it won't say anything. However, a chicken or a bird can bite a human / human foot / human toe! Then the human will be in pain and say, "Why did you bite me?!" The chicken or bird just says, "Rawr!"

Current Mood: determined
Current Location: home
Current Music: Seattle Phone Pranks, "Wrong Number"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3864259.html

From Julie: Why is it that people can add glitter to their coffee and drink it out of an avocado, but it's suddenly "out of line" when I stir in the blood of my enemies and drink from their skull? HAHAHAHA!

From Julie: Notorious Serial Killers: A Trump card game for adults!

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Roy D. Mercer, "Jordan"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3860818.html

I went out at 2:05 on a 414 to meet Rachel at the Caring Place, getting home at 3:50 on a 407. Dr. Wise's office (Megan) called me at 4:15 to try scheduling a last-minute appointment for tomorrow at noon to REPEAT an eye test that I thought the Willow UBC Eye Care Clinic already did back on November 15! Dr. Wise then said that she wanted to make sure I got the best lens possible, and she needed the info before going into the OR, so couldn't do it while I was asleep during the operation. Okay, I guess... Megan did say it was a hassle, which is right, because I said it was an inconvenience, then felt bad about it. I'd been planning to relax, but whatever! I have to be positive and believe that people will help me if I'm lost - which is bound to happen downtown!

From Erik and Sticks And Hat Tricks: Two parents watching youth hockey! "Which one is your boy?" "Why?" "I wanted to tell him how terrible he is." "You can't say that - he's only a kid. How would you like it if I said that to your boy?" "You have done that all game!" "Who is your boy?" "The referee." HAHAHAHA!

From Julie: Ramatu is Sai's mother?!

From Julie: Sai is a girl?!

Current Mood: stressed
Current Location: home
Current Music: Radiohead, "Karma Police"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3853217.html

Deb called me at 1:25 to see about my post-surgery care. Yes, I'm welcome to stay there for about a week for company purposes. The medicine dosage instructions do seem complicated, that's for sure! At 2:30, I called the pharmacy next door to see if my prescription was ready - the Lotemax Gel / Prolensa / Moxifloxacin eyedrops were definitely there, so I went there at 4 to pick them up. Only two of them were covered (Ocuflox and Ratio-Prednisolone), but that was what Dr. Wise sent Adam, so I guess it should be okay if a doctor upstairs only gives those two. He said to pull the eyelid down to create a sort of pouch and then drop the medicine in, and to wait a few minutes between each dose.

Scrapped Robot on the MOTHER 3 Highway: "I AM A BROKEN ROBOT."

Scrapped Robot on the MOTHER 3 Highway: "I HAVE FORGOTTEN WHY I AM BROKEN, THOUGH..."

Scrapped Robot on the MOTHER 3 Highway: "YOU CERTAINLY HAVE A LOT OF FREE TIME TO BE TALKING TO SOMETHING LIKE ME."

Scrapped Robot on the MOTHER 3 Highway: "SORRY! SORRY! IT WAS RUDE OF ME TO SAY THAT."

Current Mood: relieved
Current Location: home
Current Music: Mark Knofler, "Wood"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3849883.html

Little kid: "But I told Santa I wanted a PONY!" Instead, she gets a baby!

From Reddit on Oct. 23, 2018: No, EricaT713, we do NOT call our vagina a "cuckoo"! I can understand euphemisms and have used them myself, but CUCKOO?! Even "cooch" would be more understandable, although I don't use that one!

From Reddit on April 12, 2018: No, EricaT713, VAGINAS ARE NOT CUCKOOS!

Current Mood: cold
Current Location: home
Current Music: Queensrÿche, "Cold"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3847608.html

After COFFEE TIME, I went out at 2:05 on a 414 for my last 2018 appointment with Rachel, and got home at 4 on a 407. There IS a two-hour gap in service for the 407 at Brighouse - WHAT THE FUCK?! I showered today. The Canucks played the Lightning at 7 tonight, and lost 5-2 in a fight-filled game.

Hey, Santa! Don't let the kids see you getting high! He's trimming the buds. He's checking them twice. We're gonna get high. It's gonna be nice.

This is why you don't put blue Christmas lights on palm trees... "Alright, Jim, turn the light on... Oh, God... turn them off, turn them OFF!!" They look like PENISES!

Current Mood: bitchy
Current Location: home
Current Music: Mark Knofler, "Catherine"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3845737.html

From Reddit on October 11, 2018: If you just don't like baby showers, bridal showers, and weddings... SAY SO, RobotRosa! "Highly gendered stuff," my ass!

Current Mood: cranky
Current Location: home
Current Music: MOJO in the Morning, "Towel Street Scam"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3842304.html

The Canucks played the Sharks at 6 tonight, and lost 4-0. I wondered about Melker Eriksson's name, but Behind the Name says it's the Swedish form of Melchior. Neat factoid there!

From Julie: London is a girl's name?! It should be a PLACE NAME ONLY!

From Julie: LaPiffany?! Why not just Tiffany?!

From Julie: Lavelle?! Reminds me of Laval, Quebec!

From Julie: China is a black woman's name?! Again, it should be a PLACE NAME ONLY!

From Julie: Kidd is a black woman's name?!

From Julie: Zamir?!

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Location: home
Current Music: Howard Stern, "Gretchen"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3837276.html

After COFFEE TIME, I went out at 2:05 on a 414 to see Rachel at The Caring Place, then I took the next buses to be home at 3:45. AWESOME AND BOUNDARY TALKING!

Salsa and Fassad are fighting a Barrel Man in Castle Osohe's basement in MOTHER 3. Fassad is thinking about Western-style clothing in battle - WHY?!

From Julie: Angeliegha Stewart?! Angel, Angela, Angelia, Angelie, and Angelique would all have been acceptable alternatives to this mess of Scrabble tiles...

Current Mood: indescribable
Current Location: home
Current Music: Flaming Genitals, "Wood"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3836228.html

I went to the Westminster Medical Clinic across the street at 2:45 so I could get some removal for hearing, after two confirmation phone calls just in case Dr. Chong was running behind. Now it's OXO bouillon time at home when I got in at 3:25!

Flint is talking to this pig at Alec's mountain cabin on Mount Oriander. "O-oink. (I wanna see the ocean.)"

Now Flint is talking to the other pig, with the cow and mouse in the background at Alec's mountain cabin on Mount Oriander. "O-oink oink. (I wanna see a pig seeing the ocean.)"

Flint and Alec are chasing chickens, with the cow / pigs / Arrow Lizard around. Chicken: "(Please don't chase after me. Please don't chase birds.)"

Flint and Alec are chasing chickens, with the cow / pigs / Arrow Lizard around. Chicken: "Cluck cluuuck?! (Why are you chasing me?!)"

Current Mood: relieved
Current Location: home
Current Music: Bum Bar Bastards, "Judy"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3832917.html

After a flurry of emails last night and my COFFEE TIME this morning, Dad called me at 10:35 AM to say that he'd made an appointment for 2 tomorrow with Uncle Stanley's lady associate at Kingsway and Slocan. ("as you know, Uncle Stanley isn't feeling well..." Nope, I did not know that!) He and Mom will take me out to lunch beforehand, so they want to pick me up at 12. Fine, I guess! At least I don't have to bus all the way there! Not that I had to bus to Auntie Anita's Royal Bank location when Steph and I set up the plan originally in 2009! Thank goodness I have whiskey at home for later, hahaha.

From Reddit on September 21, 2018: Learning disabilities do exist. Discrimination against the disabled also does exist. I don't think an insistence on correct spelling is ableist, Frothulhu… also, you are "non-binary" according to your subreddit flair, so you need to PICK A GENDER AND STICK WITH IT! Much easier for everyone else!

Current Mood: okay
Current Location: home
Current Music: Dead Kennedys, "Halloween"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3827744.html

Today is Thanksgiving!

From Reddit and r/askwomen: Urban Meyer?!

Current Mood: geeky
Current Location: home
Current Music: Soundgarden, "Burden in my Hand"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3821255.html

Thanksgiving! "Happy Canadian Thanksgiving!" "Happy TURKEY EH right back atcha!" "Canadian Thanksgiving is the only prequel that doesn't depress me. Why do you guys eat your turkey a month early?" "Why do you guys eat your turkey a month LATE?" "Touché." "Quit copying! French is OUR second language."

Julie W. sent this to me via Grammarly: Turkeys gobble, Grandma. Turkeys, gobble Grandma. Comma placement matters.

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Soundgarden, "Spoonman"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3820405.html

It's TACO DAY today!

Doge birthday cake: Wow, such birthday!

From Youtube and EVIL LIVES HERE: Cherry Walker and Rueon Walker?!

Current Mood: okay
Current Location: home
Current Music: Smashing Pumpkins, "Love"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3820128.html

The Canucks played the Flames in their first game of the 2018-2019 regular NHL season tonight at 7, and won 5-2! Pettersen got his first NHL goal on his first shot in his first game - his family was there, too!

This isn't Dove bar soap. It's a DOGE soap bar!

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Pepper?!

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Lace?! Not Lacey...

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Location: home
Current Music: ZZ Top, "Sleeping Bag"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3819909.html

I left at 10:30 on a 407 to meet Mom and Dad at Oakridge with my fall / winter coats that may need complicated washing, but I have no idea why Mom's appointment with Dr. Kuo the acupuncturist would take two hours. STABWOUND THERAPY! Oh wait, they CHATTED?! Dad insisted on accompanying me to St. Paul's Hospital after New York Fries and A&W, which is fine, but I DID NOT NEED "You have to get over the escalator thing" or walking downtown for more than I had to! I know my energy levels; he doesn't! After that, I went to Yaohan to get some beef internal noodles at the food court as a treat and a reward. When I got home at 4:15 on a 407, I showered and am now talking to Jimmy.

From Julie: When I make the mistake of asking my wife why she can't sleep… Bert and Ernie style!

Current Mood: drunk
Current Location: home
Current Music: the Scorpions, "Action"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3817752.html

Vanessa wanted to know if tomorrow works for me since she has to go to Vancouver from Langley anyway - sure, why not? I can take advantage of things like my free My BP offer of Pizza Bread OR Cactus Cuts OR Yam Fries... AND Boston Pizza Pasta Tuesday! Time for a shower before eating dinner!

Edit at 11: She wanted to change the restaurant because there is soy in a lot of things at Boston Pizza. I was okay with that, so Pho 37 at Ironwood in Steveston it is! (the reviews are good)

From Julie: A colorful mosaic dragon!

From Lesley and Meanwhile in Canada: "No! I don't wanna go back to school!" "I know, honey, I know... but you HAVE to..." "WHY?" "Because you're a teacher!"

Current Mood: optimistic
Current Location: home
Current Music: Bon Jovi, "Reunion"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3807174.html

After COFFEE TIME, I left at 2 on a 401 to make it to Jon's by 2:30 or so. Ayler asked me whether I brought chocolate this time - nope, because I chose not to, despite what he said about how that wasn't true. He also told me that Jon said I had to fill up their bath water later - I DON'T THINK SO! We made it to Sunrise for skating lessons, with slightly more time to get the kids ice-ready. Harmony and I talked about the baby, Portland, Squamish, Nathan, family, the cute kids on the ice, my toilet book, and how it takes an equal amount of time to leave the house and get ready as it does to have the half-hour lesson. Got home to have fish cakes, lime, laksa noodles, leftover pizza, cherries, and a green melon smoothie with some seeds for dinner. Hiero said that the toy trains were diaper trains, said that Bambi started "fire-burning" by kicking people, and wanted me to read LILY AND TROOPER to him. Ayler just wanted to "show Hiero a trick," which I was 99% sure involved taking my hat off, so I said that I wouldn't read to him if that was the case.

I talked to baby Beckett in his crib when he was being fussy, and later held him for about ten minutes in the rocking chair after doing the dinner dishes. No, Ayler was not allowed to wake him up when he'd just fallen asleep. Harmony had gone to the lards' place briefly to measure stuff after a few people all came at once to view their place - one party was rather late! Jon asked about next week, but I wasn't quite sure with my eventual vision issues. Maybe I can get Barry to drop me off at Oakridge that day... I got home at 8:25 on a 407 because I read bedtime stories to the kids before leaving. Harmony got home again just a bit before I did, actually.

From Julie: WHY GRIZZLY BEARS SHOULD WEAR UNDERPANTS?!

Current Mood: busy
Current Location: home
Current Music: KMFDM, "Megalomaniac"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3791888.html

Palestine Ace?!

From r/canucks: Jagger Dirk is a Canucks signing?!

From Oddee: Texting with Mom! Mom: "Hi, honey, how was your day? 8=======D" Son: "WTF MOM! WHY'D YOU TYPE A PENIS EMOTICON?!?!?!?!" Mom: "I don't know what you mean. 8===D is an alien smiley face." Son: "No, it's not. It's a penis. Who told you that?" Mom: "Well, I saw it in some of your brother's texts to his girlfriend, and when I asked, he said it was an alien. Wait, so 8=====D- {()} isn't an alien getting on a ship?" Son: "... No, Mom, it isn't."

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Blur, "Fool"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3780876.html

From Julie: DANCING WITH CATS?!

From Julie: Chinese New Year Facebook stickers 2!

From Julie: Daylin Leach?!

Current Mood: devious
Current Location: home
Current Music: the Doors, "People Are Strange"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3749563.html

Jessica Lai knows a woman named ZOWIE TAN?! I know David Bowie named his son Zowie, but that isn't an Asian name...

Good grammar is like personal hygiene - you can ignore it if you want, but don't be surprised when people draw their own conclusions.

From Janina: Lesbian... please, no dudes. "One day, I was sitting on my floor watching SESAME STREET. My fairy godfaggot flew into my room and said: "Listen here, you son of a bitch, you are going to be gay. Got it?" I nodded, and then she hit me on the head with her anti-dick stick. Poof... now I'm a lesbian!" This is what I say when people ask me why I'm gay.

Current Mood: ditzy
Current Location: home
Current Music: Tori Amos, "Little Earthquakes"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3747908.html

I went to London Drugs on a 401 (just managing to get the bus in the intermittent snowflakes) at 11:55 so I could get one more two-pack of Designer Workshop pillowcases since the half-price sale ends today. I got THE WRONG SIZE - I DON'T NEED KING SIZE! Also got a NEW steak and mushroom melt from Subway, and on-sale Reese's peanut butter and chocolate hearts x3 / a Cambridge cutlery set / rubbing alcohol. After I got home at 12:30 on a 401, I paid my Shaw and hydro bills online. I'll shower later at some point.

Edit: I went back out at 3:20 to see if I could return / exchange the king-size pillowcase pack. Thank goodness I could! I bought Alter Eco Pacific organic chocolate x3 (Brown Butter / Salt and Malt / Blackout) for Harmony's birthday, Palmolive Oxy dish detergent, and two properly-sized pillowcases! I got home at 3:50, and it was time for some white tea!

Steak and Mushroom Melt from Subway!

Alter Ego dark organic chocolate; BLACKOUT!

Alter Ego dark organic chocolate; BROWN BUTTER!

Steak and Mushroom Melt from Subway!

Krista once shared this Cyanide and Happiness comic with me from Pinterest: "Nice bike! Is it a Yamaha?" "No." "Is it a Honda?" "No." "Is it a Kawasaki?" "No. It's a menstrual cycle." The guy drives away, and there's a smear of blood on the ground as he does so! HAHAHAHA!

From BGG's Earthbound server: "GEGAR! Why is my pasta broken!" "Oops... Wednesdays are bad."

Current Mood: cold
Current Location: home
Current Music: AC/DC, "Back in Black"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3747312.html

From Julie M. and Lost Pinup: Having plans always seems like a good idea... until you realize you have to put on pants and leave the house.

From a Fearsome Vancouver Canucks Fans member request: Rosalee BUTTULS Martel?! Reminds me of Steven and Cathy Buttle from Ferris elementary school...

This mug is from Julie: Hey Cuntmuffin, why don't you climb in your douche canoe, cry me a river, and float the fuck away?!

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Live, "Heaven"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3738604.html

Mom called me at 8 to see if I was feeling better and if I was going tomorrow to Pizzeria Barbarella. Not really, and NO! She mentioned her email that she'd sent earlier in the week. Yeah, but that doesn't mean I have to REPLY... sheesh! Also cancelled on Jon, who says Harma is also coughing a lot. Monday - maybe 5 to 6. Should work!

From Reddit: There's a country musician who is actually named Stonewall Jackson?! SWEET!

From Reddit: Engelbert Humperdinck?! This is badass!

From Reddit on May 25, 2017: "I recently learned that using GIRLFRIENDS to refer to platonic friends is offensive." What?! Are people just LOOKING for things to be offended by these days? It may be confusing, but certainly not OFFENSIVE... *rolleyes*

Current Mood: devious
Current Location: home
Current Music: Matthew Good, "House of Smoke and Mirrors"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3737439.html

I've been on Discord for a year now - whee! :D

GREEN TEA TIME AND COFFEE TIME! The Canucks played the Leafs at 4 today; the game unfortunately went to overtime plus a shootout, and Vancouver lost the game 3-2.

From Translink: Sherif Tarek? I think your parents were going for Sheriff, but misspelled it...

Wait a minute. Sherif Tarek is supposedly married to a guy named Cheen Amr?! What?!

From Not Always Working: Cat Xochiquetzal Amanigh?! Maybe he dresses up in drag! Actually, I've learned that he's trans. Fair enough!

From Reddit, AndyTuba, and Buttersafe: This demon says, "You should not have come here, human. Why do you cross through my domain?" The guy says, "I was on my way to the kitchen for a snack, and I got lost." The demon asks, "You ended up in the twelfth plane of torment on your way to the kitchen?" The guy responds, "I am not a clever man."

Current Mood: disappointed
Current Location: home
Current Music: KMFDM, "Hello"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3729436.html

In EARTHBOUND, Ness and Pokey Minch make it up to the Onett hilltop and check out the meteorite before talking to Picky Minch. "Caution! There are still lots of fires burning here and there! It's HOT!"

From Not Always Working: Dannaca M. Patterson?! That should be spelled DANICA!

From Not Always Working: Cass Snuzzle?!

Current Mood: irritated
Current Location: home
Current Music: GWAR, "Maggots"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3714061.html

From George Takei: Do not touch bread with hands. Please use tongue.

From We Love To Laugh and I Love Halloween: My boyfriend was dying. I was by his bedside when he said in a weak voice, "There's something I must confess." "Shhh," I said. "There's nothing to confess. Everything is all right." "No, I must die in peace," he said. "I had sex with your sister, your best friend, and a co-worker." "I know," I whispered. "That's why I poisoned you... now, close your eyes."

Pita Taufatofua?!

Current Mood: productive
Current Location: home
Current Music: Children of Bodom. "Warheart"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3712836.html

During COFFEE TIME this afternoon, I went to the pharmacy next door (propping the side door open with my mop bucket since I didn't want to go around to the front door in the rainy weather) to pick up my newest birth control prescription, Minestrin! It came in two thin wallet-like pouches, which definitely is slightly less waste than three small boxes. Jon wanted to know if I was available to help out with the kids on Mondays again if he was teaching again then - sure, why not? At least I got their newest address so I could look up how to get there on Translink. The Canucks played Philadelphia at 4 today, and won 5-2... it was pretty intense! Seems Kelli changed her address, too, but I totally understand needing to get out of a toxic relationship!

From Not Always Friendly: Tahnee Brown?! If this is an attempt to avoid "Tawnee / Tawny Brown," it doesn't work for me. It reminds me of TAHINI, man! At least those purple pansies look nice...

From Not Always Friendly: Catherine Tree?! Nice! At least her parents avoided any noun / fruit / flower names!

Wait, Catherine Tree is in a relationship with someone named CARSTEN Beyer?!

From my UNCANNY BATHROOM READER #29: Eietyoung Kemp had an underwear gun which killed his friend Robert Alston?!

Current Mood: ecstatic
Current Location: home
Current Music: Ministry, "Lava"
Crossposts: https://glowing-dragon.livejournal.com/3707466.html

Steph called me at 2:10 to see whether I was going to a last-minute dinner at Kwong Chow, near Main and 16th. Sure, I guess so... I was due to take a shower anyway, so I did that.

From OLD FAITHFUL Bathroom Reader #30: Timothy Shotwell is a sheriff?!