Tatiana's Wanderings

From Julie: B-Horror Movie Title Generator! Night of the Sorority from Outer Space! Yes, it was blurry and cut off when she got it. If you have a first or last name that starts with V-Z, you're out of luck!

Teenage, Biker, Atomic, Killer, Martian, Evil, Psycho, Attack of the, Lost, Curse of the, Radioactive, Night of the, 50-Foot, Invasion of the, Bloody, Revenge of the, The Last, Demon, Return of the, Deadly

Mutant(s), Occult, Amazon(s), Blood-Sucking / Blood Suckers, Clown(s), Nympho(s), Ghost(s), She-Devil(s), Sorority, Vampire(s), Virgin(s), Sex-Crazed (Fiends)

Slumber Party, Camp, Planet, From Hell, Cheerleaders, High School, Beach Party, Zombies, Cat People, Island, Massacre, Misfits, From Mars, From Outer Space, House, Werewolves, Aliens, School Girls, That Wouldn't Die, Prom Night, Robots




From Julie: There are just some sounds that everyone loves. Shoes on gravel. Crackling of a fire. The snapping of necks of those who think they can disrespect you. Cats purring.




From Hell: If Jesus masturbated, would he do it like this up and down normally? Or like this with the holes created by the nails on the cross?

Ahmad Zaldy tried adding one of my alteregos on Facebook - DENIED! I had to do laundry AGAIN today because there was some water by the toilet, maybe caused by my upstairs neighbor showering! I hope it's not another leak... and I also hope my white bamboo towel isn't mildewed because I had to wait for my lazy as fuck neighbors to get their act together in the third-floor laundry room! UGH!


From Violet / Faith in the sober Discord server: Once a month, my lady parts are like, "Bro, I'm straight up not having a good time."




Jeff Hor?! Sounds very definitely like WHORE!




From SFX Off-Topic: Ellen Toothacker has a cool last name! Is it Toot-Hacker or Tooth-Hacker?




From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Lovie says her son is not the monster in the media?!

HAPPY EASTER MONDAY 2020!


I went shopping at 11:10 on a 401 today, getting home at 12:10 on a 407. Got 100 regular garbage bags for $20 (40 for $8.99), on-sale Jergen's Ultra Care Restoring Argan lotion in 100 mL / on-sale Jergens Original Cherry Almond lotion in 600 mL since I'm running out, store brand lemon dish detergent, on-sale Lindt mini Gold Bunny with mini Easter eggs, on-sale Russell Stover milk chocolate Iddy Biddy Bunnies (50!), on-sale Russell Stover coconut cream / marshmallow and caramel / strawberry cream / caramel / marshmallow Easter eggs, on-sale Russell Stover marshmallow and peanut butter Easter bunnies x2, on-sale Reese Easter eggs stuffed with Reese's Pieces, an on-sale Waterbridge Spring Masterpiece box of Swiss and Belgian chocolates, on-sale Febreze Fabric Refresher, a $5 box of Girl Guides chocolate and vanilla cookies, Gillette bar mop towels x8, a yellow LifeCandy shower pouf, and Heinz white vinegar 1L x3.

It was the first time that I had to board on the back of the bus with my Asian old lady shopping cart because the front area is blocked off with a rope - easy BEFORE the shopping cart, but not so much afterwards! At least I was able to get on and off the bus home - a poor lady in an electric scooter had to find another way to get home! I still think the bus driver was bitchy because I have mobility issues, and I should have noted down her bus number so I could report her later! UGH!


Hungry-Man turkey microwaveable meal, mashed potatoes, stuffing, corn on the cob, and an apple cranberry dessert for my Easter Monday 2020 dinner!




( Lotion, Easter chocolate, and more! )


From Julie: Winnie the Pooh is checking on his summer body progress in a mirror. Haha, yep, still fat as shit.




Breakfast: Nissin black garlic oil noodles!

I went to Price Smart at 6, where there was zero enforcement of a lineup. I was in and out in ten minutes or so, which is a record these days with the coronavirus pandemic! I got NEW Old Dutch Foods Canada Spicy Salt and Vinegar chips, NEW Saniderm 70% hand sanitizer in a 236 mL bottle for $9, NEW Stouffer’s Cheddar Potato Bake, Smart Ones Pot Roast, NEW Hungry-Man XL Bowls / Pies x4 (Chicken Pot Pie / Buffalo-Style Chicken Macaroni and Cheese / Country-Fried Chicken Croquettes Bowl / Spicy Chicken Queso Burrito), Hungry-Man Turkey, and Hungry-Man Beer-Battered Chicken before coming home at 6:55, just in time for the 7 PM cheer! Saw a bunch of people outside, and I told some kids "Nice poster!" and gave them a thumbs-up.


From Matt: Homestar Runner Wiki has these funny coronavirus-themed logos! From the Strong Bad email Sick Day: QUARANTINE! Yellow crime scene tape! This one made me laugh THE MOST!




( More purchases! )


From Dragons: Crystal Naydean Hoyt?! BAD SPELLING OF NADINE!




From Julie: This black St. Jude patient is named VON?!

Overpriced lemon-mint hand sanitizer! It's April Fools Day 2020 today. UGH! I went out at 5:35 on a 407 to do some shopping at London Drugs. Then I got NEW All Clean lemon-mint spray hand sanitizer for $2 cheaper than the pharmacy next door, on-sale Natural Choice multi-purpose printer paper, on-sale HERSHEY'S cookies and cream Easter eggs, on-sale Hershey's Reese Eggies, an on-sale Frankford cookies and cream Easter bunny, a new iDesign shower mat, new Splash shower curtain hooks, and NEW Amarena Cherry / O111range Porta chocolate bars x2.

Noticed that bus seats were actually closed and there was an announcement sign about giving people more space. Got home at 6:35 on another 407, and then noticed the marked / unmarked police cars right outside my window at 6:55. I'm beginning to think that this IS the 7 PM cheer for medical workers since they started up right around then, and left a couple minutes afterwards.


Translink says: Thanks for giving more space during the coronavirus pandemic!




( Cookies and Cream! Shower mats! Woo! )


Samyang curry terrorist noodles with corn, green peas, broccoli, and Brussels sprouts! SPICY!




OREGON TRAIL: You have died of coronavirus.




No, that's not how "she / her" works, RhinoBallerina... you're also a cheater when you're married since you admit to having "another partner"! I can assure you that only 1% of people care about pronouns. Don't tell me to get over it. This was the last straw for me with the TrollXOver 30 Discord server. I had to leave! DO NOT SHOVE IT IN OTHER PEOPLE'S FACES!

Ayler called me at 3 to talk about Beckett going around with a blanket on his head (the same one that Hiero pulled off - and then Hiero was upset for five minutes), playing a six-page version of PACHELBEL'S CANON which took seven minutes to complete, knowing a couple of six-syllable words ("onomatopoeia" and "responsibility"), his doing online school tomorrow, Beckett's boh-boh and eggs, talking to his list of people (Uncle Joe / Auntie Wing Yee / Eric / Randal / Jeremy), his liking to talk (I can tell!), and their lunch of tuna melts. He said he goes outside and likes to play tag if he can, but plays CONNECT FOUR inside, and also reads books and keeps Beckett safe when he can. I told him that his pieces were nice (except for Hiero / Beckett crying - which he said "sorry" for later), and thanked him for playing... also when he played the Willowbrook Waltz.

He gave me his grandparents' phone numbers, said that he had reached me first before I called them, and described a magic trick he could do in person. I heard Beckett say "Auntie," so I told HIM that as soon as I can, I will go over there so we can hang out. Ayler asked how old the oldest man was, since the oldest woman ever was 122 years old. I looked it up: 116 years old ever, and a man was JUST awarded a Guinness World Record for being 112 years old. Ayler asked whether Jeanne Calment had been in good health - well, she did smoke a lot (being in France) and ate tons of chocolate, but other than that, I guess so. Ayler told me that he liked being creative and writing stories - awesome! I should tell him about my "goat royalty" stories as a kid around his age, haha.

He asked me whether I had allergies because of the cherry blossoms and spring; I told him that I did not, but I was apparently very lucky. Harmony had told him that I was born prematurely - I am a dragon like he is, which is why I gave him the red-and-yellow stuffed dragon that Beckett has in his crib now. Hiero is a Snake, and Beckett is a Dog. I told him that learning was a good thing, while he wondered if my clock did minutes and seconds - apparently, he tells Jeremy what time it is and counts it up!

He asked me whether I knew that his dad's "special sleep window" was 11:30 PM to 3 AM, since that's when Jon can sleep best. Haha, no! I do not currently have trouble sleeping, so that's good. He ended the call at 4:05 or so, during which I could hear Jon in the background, so he was home then. We can talk next on Wednesday after his online school and everything else - no, I'm not likely to be available before then at 8:45 AM! He told me, "I'm glad you're alive because then I can talk to you, and you can take care of us. If you die, my dad will be the oldest, right?" HAHAHAHA!


Nacho tombstone?!