Tatiana's Wanderings

Deliberately leaving things around to trip on?! / Blocking people for fun?! NO!

Mon, 04 May 2020 04:44:25 GMT

The kids called me at 6:45 to scream-sing a song about (as far as I can tell) licking bums or nicking bums, and asked me inappropriate questions about whether I'd like to see Jon peeing. No, thank you! Then Ayler asked if I would eat a whole pie (which Hiero said they were having for dessert) because of my "big stomach" - mmm, no, I'm not on MY 600-POUND LIFE! Harmony said that was their father's influence - yeah, I can TELL! I said hi to Beckett, who didn't really say anything. but that's okay. It was pretty brief because they just wanted to sing a song, which is fine. Life is as usual over there, I see! I joked that when social distancing is over, I'd buy a pie to throw at their dad just for all these "jokes."

From Reddit on April 23, 2019: No, PickWhatCar, deliberately leaving things for you to step on is NOT something you should laugh about. It's time to have a SERIOUS TALK with your boyfriend! What if you'd tripped over it and hurt yourself?!

From Reddit on May 14, 2019: No, "I'm blocking you" is not a silly game which should make you giggle. What if you have mobility issues like I do? I don't think you should LIKE being blocked on your way out of a room! For me, the blocking game would NOT be fun. You know I have shit to do and you're getting in my way for fun? Nope, you stay where you are. Besides, you deleted your Reddit account and I still have both of mine, so I WIN!

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No Live Clean soaps! / Qualesha Williams and Katlyn Brieskorn?! GHETTO SPELLING!

Fri, 01 May 2020 03:25:29 GMT

PRODUCT WARNING: No more Live Clean hand soaps! The pump squirts at weird angles! (I'm noticing a theme, pattern, or coincidence here...) I don't care when the Live Clean body washes do that since it all just washes off while I'm taking a shower anyway.

It's National Bubble Tea Day 2020 today!

From r/TrueCrimeDiscussion: Qualesha Williams put bleach on an inmate's food?! GHETTO! One of the reporters is named KATLYN BRIESKORN?! BAD SPELLING OF KAITLIN!

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B-Horror Movie Title Generator, snapping disrespectful necks, Jesus masturbation

Tue, 28 Apr 2020 17:52:22 GMT

From Julie: B-Horror Movie Title Generator! Night of the Sorority from Outer Space! Yes, it was blurry and cut off when she got it. If you have a first or last name that starts with V-Z, you're out of luck!

Teenage, Biker, Atomic, Killer, Martian, Evil, Psycho, Attack of the, Lost, Curse of the, Radioactive, Night of the, 50-Foot, Invasion of the, Bloody, Revenge of the, The Last, Demon, Return of the, Deadly

Mutant(s), Occult, Amazon(s), Blood-Sucking / Blood Suckers, Clown(s), Nympho(s), Ghost(s), She-Devil(s), Sorority, Vampire(s), Virgin(s), Sex-Crazed (Fiends)

Slumber Party, Camp, Planet, From Hell, Cheerleaders, High School, Beach Party, Zombies, Cat People, Island, Massacre, Misfits, From Mars, From Outer Space, House, Werewolves, Aliens, School Girls, That Wouldn't Die, Prom Night, Robots

From Julie: There are just some sounds that everyone loves. Shoes on gravel. Crackling of a fire. The snapping of necks of those who think they can disrespect you. Cats purring.

From Hell: If Jesus masturbated, would he do it like this up and down normally? Or like this with the holes created by the nails on the cross?

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Scavenger hunts and cheese! / I am more than what people see! / Cactuar!

Wed, 22 Apr 2020 01:49:19 GMT

Ayler called me at 4:15 - yes, he still does the 7 PM cheer and plays O CANADA on the piano to go with his neighbor on the guitar! He had just gotten in from a scavenger hunt where they had to find noises, and I could hear Hiero and Beckett just roiling around as usual. Of course I said hi to them, but Ayler thought that I believed THEY were on the phone... "No, this is still Ayler - you can tell that's Beckett because of his different voice!" Jon was telling him in the background to ask me what Sidekicks I was going to eat tonight - I told him that he was an ugfart! (Ayler asked what that meant, so I told him that it didn't matter) Then Ayler asked what I was having for dinner because they were having nachos - I said I hadn't decided yet, but I had chicken croquettes AND added Western Family Parmesan cheese (non-red container) to my shopping list for tomorrow because of a stupid asshole vegan on Reddit, actually!

He said he could only talk to me for ten minutes today since he had half an hour total to talk to three people, but wanted to set up a talk time on the weekend since he'd have more time then. Sounds good - Saturday afternoon it is! Ayler said he had to go, which is fine by me.

From These Quotes Are Awesome and Positive Outlooks: I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be, but most people are unaware that I am so much more than what they see.

FINAL FANTASY Cactuar! JPG and GIF!

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Sharing the gospel with Coke! / Fuck Off Mountain! / Game that can pitch forbidden

Tue, 21 Apr 2020 22:26:24 GMT

Lunch: Tazo green ginger tea and Vedan Bah Kut tea noodles for National Tea Day today!

From Julie: My pastor encouraged me to share the gospel more often. Am I doing this right by sharing Coke bottles with Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John?

From Pete and Imgflip: You can fuck off with that shit. You can fuck straight off to Fuck Off Mountain while riding your fuck horse to the land of Awwww Hell No!

Game that can pitch forbidden! I can also collection of bar code that came out... ENGRISH!

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Daiso electric light-up poop stick! / 666 in toilet paper from HELL! / Shemida?!

Tue, 21 Apr 2020 17:22:55 GMT

From Melissa: Daiso Japan sells an electric light-up poop stick?!

From Hell: 666 in toilet paper rolls! CORONAVIRUS!

From Julie M. and DR. PHIL: Shemida?!

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GALACTIC GARBAGE STATION, my fourth Reddit silver, Let's Game It Out scenarios

Mon, 20 Apr 2020 06:41:53 GMT

Knorr Garlic Alfredo Fettuccine, the rest of my Classico Alfredo sauce, Jamieson zinc and garlic pills, sriracha sauce, chili flakes, and black pepper as lunch for National Garlic Day today!

An English translation of an amusing Chinese webnovel: GALACTIC GARBAGE STATION! Thanks, Hidden One!

From Julie: Let's Game It Out on Youtube! Weird video game scenarios!

Got my fourth Reddit silver on April 10, 2020 for correcting Ummah_Strong on his usage of "folx." That's not even a word, and should be FOLKS! Then there's "alot" vs. "a lot."

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Trogdor the Burninator, cave black dragon, black obsidian dragon, MONSTER HUNTER

Thu, 16 Apr 2020 04:33:19 GMT

Tried calling Chrystal at home, but instead just texted her for her birthday today. She said thanks, and added that she can't work at home - damn!

TROGDOR THE BURNINATOR! :D

From Julie: A black dragon with a sunburst in a cave!

From Julie M. and Wish: Black obsidian Chinese dragon pendant necklace!

From Julie M. and Wish: MONSTER HUNTER dragon models! Being me, I had to fix the egregious BAD SPELLING of "dinosaur" in MS Paint.

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Personality tests! / Assholes and fuckery! / Alychia Chan?! / Shaylen?! / Pako?!

Sat, 11 Apr 2020 23:13:37 GMT

From Julie: Lots of interesting personality tests from Individual Differences Research Labs to pass the time, all in one place!

PRODUCT WARNING: Jergen's Moisturizing Honey lotion is now banned from my apartment. The scent is way too faint for my preferences! UGH! Unscented is one thing, but this is 0.1% away from no-scent lotion!

I showered and did laundry today.

From Julie: Grant me the serenity to accept that the world is filled with assholes and fuckery that I cannot change, the courage not to be part of the assholery and fuckery, and the wisdom to know I'm the shit without shitting on others.

ALYCHIA Chan?! BAD SPELLING OF ALICIA! She lives in Wellington, New Zealand.

From Julie: Shaylen?!

From Julie: Pako W?

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Chocolate birthday cake! / Batman Happy Birthday! / Jerimy?! / Dehydrated mud!

Wed, 01 Apr 2020 03:47:23 GMT

Took a shower tonight and noted that this foliage shower curtain seems to be doing its job right now. It seems to have more coverage area than the old Splash shower curtain, so that's good. There was a lot of noise right outside my window around 6:50 PM - unmarked police cars, marked police cars, sirens, and ambulances! TOTALLY unconnected to the 7 PM cheer for medical workers since that hasn't happened around here!

For April Fools Day 2020, I was Dragon Teacher GranmaFlam in Shiwa's Discord server!

Happy birthday 4: Chocolate cake with candles, holly, and stars!

From Janet on LJ, AKA ghost_light: Batman Happy Birthday! Eric M. and Nathan would like this!

From Michelle and the V4F Discord server: Jerimy?! BAD SPELLING OF JEREMY!

Thank goodness it's raining again... my mud was getting dehydrated. *rolleyes*

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Nacho tombstone?! / PACHELBEL'S CANON, blankets, online school, onomatopoeia

Wed, 01 Apr 2020 00:41:09 GMT

Ayler called me at 3 to talk about Beckett going around with a blanket on his head (the same one that Hiero pulled off - and then Hiero was upset for five minutes), playing a six-page version of PACHELBEL'S CANON which took seven minutes to complete, knowing a couple of six-syllable words ("onomatopoeia" and "responsibility"), his doing online school tomorrow, Beckett's boh-boh and eggs, talking to his list of people (Uncle Joe / Auntie Wing Yee / Eric / Randal / Jeremy), his liking to talk (I can tell!), and their lunch of tuna melts. He said he goes outside and likes to play tag if he can, but plays CONNECT FOUR inside, and also reads books and keeps Beckett safe when he can. I told him that his pieces were nice (except for Hiero / Beckett crying - which he said "sorry" for later), and thanked him for playing... also when he played the Willowbrook Waltz.

He gave me his grandparents' phone numbers, said that he had reached me first before I called them, and described a magic trick he could do in person. I heard Beckett say "Auntie," so I told HIM that as soon as I can, I will go over there so we can hang out. Ayler asked how old the oldest man was, since the oldest woman ever was 122 years old. I looked it up: 116 years old ever, and a man was JUST awarded a Guinness World Record for being 112 years old. Ayler asked whether Jeanne Calment had been in good health - well, she did smoke a lot (being in France) and ate tons of chocolate, but other than that, I guess so. Ayler told me that he liked being creative and writing stories - awesome! I should tell him about my "goat royalty" stories as a kid around his age, haha.

He asked me whether I had allergies because of the cherry blossoms and spring; I told him that I did not, but I was apparently very lucky. Harmony had told him that I was born prematurely - I am a dragon like he is, which is why I gave him the red-and-yellow stuffed dragon that Beckett has in his crib now. Hiero is a Snake, and Beckett is a Dog. I told him that learning was a good thing, while he wondered if my clock did minutes and seconds - apparently, he tells Jeremy what time it is and counts it up!

He asked me whether I knew that his dad's "special sleep window" was 11:30 PM to 3 AM, since that's when Jon can sleep best. Haha, no! I do not currently have trouble sleeping, so that's good. He ended the call at 4:05 or so, during which I could hear Jon in the background, so he was home then. We can talk next on Wednesday after his online school and everything else - no, I'm not likely to be available before then at 8:45 AM! He told me, "I'm glad you're alive because then I can talk to you, and you can take care of us. If you die, my dad will be the oldest, right?" HAHAHAHA!

Nacho tombstone?!

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Hands On Children Museum?! Dog and Cat Repair?! / Small and big DUMPSTER FIRES!

Wed, 11 Mar 2020 04:52:55 GMT

It's MARIO DAY today! The Canucks played the Islanders tonight at 7, and won 5-4 in overtime and the SHOOTOUT just now! Thanks, refs...

From Julie and Anorak UK: Hands On Children Museum?! Dog and Cat Repair?!

From Discord: A small dumpster fire!

From Discord: Dumpster fire emote, enlarged!

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Fuzzy blue toilet seat cover and 2002 memories! / Coronavirus? NO SHITTING!

Tue, 10 Mar 2020 19:51:03 GMT

It's MARIO DAY today! :D

From Julie and 22 Words: Lord, no! Hey, we all love a comfortable toilet seat, so the idea of using a toilet cover shouldn't be so shocking. But this... this is an affront to all that is good in the world.

If that's a fuzzy blue toilet seat cover, I actually used to have one! When people were over at my place for a Fellowship prayer meeting in 2002, Joe asked whether he could use the washroom... of course! Afterwards, he came out and said: "Speaking as a guy, it's really hard to use your toilet!" Everyone else present wanted to know why, so he told us that it was the fuzzy blue toilet seat cover... holding it up while peeing created the potential for danger. Maxine's pantomime of a guy using my toilet was hilarious! :D

From Amanda: Coronavirus symptoms do NOT include shitting yourself, so there's no need to panic-buy toilet paper!

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Cari Lang Hairapist and Fuk Mi Sushi Seafood Buffet?! / Unvaccinated children!

Tue, 10 Mar 2020 03:52:41 GMT

I showered today before going out briefly at 8:15 on a 407 to get bulk pads x2 at London Drugs, which is of course sold out of hand sanitizer. They seemed to have a decent supply of toilet paper and Wet ones and other Lysol / Clorox products, though. Got home just now at 8:40 on another 407. They also had pistachio Lindt truffles - ick! Canada also had its first death from coronavirus today, in a North Van care home.

Pistachio Lindt truffles!

From Julie and Anorak UK: Cari Lang Hairapist and Fuk Mi Sushi Seafood Buffet?!

From Julie M. and Make A Meme: The Grim Reaper says, "Two things that never get old are dark humor and unvaccinated children."

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PooPaint toilet paper?! / GAS OUT: THE CARD GAME! / Redneck Leprechaun Name

Wed, 04 Mar 2020 21:00:37 GMT

From Melissa: The Japanese have come up with PooPaint Toilet Paper?!

From Julie: A game called GAS OUT! Play your card, but DON'T PASS THE GAS!

From Rock 101 and Scream Therapy: What is your Redneck Leprechaun Name? Dopey Bubba O'Fartsniffer!

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Cordia, bear hugs vs. bare hugs, a grammar sheriff, ever-vigilant Spelling Nazis

Wed, 04 Mar 2020 20:56:13 GMT

It's NATIONAL GRAMMAR DAY today... MY FAVORITE! Aimee Vanderkarr tried adding one of my alteregos - DENIED!

I had a dream where the London Drugs was being changed into a Shoppers Drug Mart, complete with fences blocking off our access. Beckett came up to me and said, "Beckett comes here every day to eat junk food because it's good, Auntie." (WAY too complicated a sentence for him in his 21-month-old life!) London Drugs also had a great deal on Camelbak water bottles like Fraser's with dinosaurs, advertised as "a good way to get all your water - with a zipper bag for your bottle!" Cordia wanted some Halloween or Christmas Cheetos and shortbread snacks, but we confused her when she went to go through the maze of all the blue milk crates - she went RIGHT PAST all the Santa packs! WTF, subconscious?!

From CYANIDE AND HAPPINESS: A BEAR hug vs. a BARE hug! NO NAKED MEN!

From CYANIDE AND HAPPINESS: The grammar sheriff is in town!

From CYANIDE AND HAPPINESS: Spelling Nazis are ever vigilant, even when it comes to your suicide notes!

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May Chan, a dehumanizing used condom board, Walker's Oat Crackers, Jimbo leaving

Mon, 02 Mar 2020 05:03:28 GMT

Jimbo / Nate LEFT the SuperFriends Discord server - WHAT THE FUCK?! I went shopping at 2:05 on a 407 for on-sale NEW limited-edition pink packaging SpongeTowels paper towels, NEW London Naturals plant-based citrus detergent, Colgate MaxFresh toothpaste x2 (Clean Mint green / Cool Mint blue), Scrub Daddy, and on-sale Walkers Shortbread Highland Oat Crackers / Three-Seed Oat Crackers before getting home at 2:55 on another 407 prior to COFFEE TIME! May Chan unfriended me on Facebook, but whatever - she was just Gabriel's friend. The Canucks played Columbus today at 4, and lost 5-3 thanks to an empty-net goal AND four unanswered goals in the last eight minutes of the third period... thanks, new goalie Louie Domingue...

My NEWEST top-voted Reddit comment as of February 20, 2020: A used condom display on a public bulletin board IS disgusting and dehumanizing! 5313 points! :D Every time someone uses "body count" to describe their number of sex partners, I think: "HOW MANY PEOPLE DID YOU KILL?!?" because THAT is what "body count" really means! Millennials and zoomers, I swear...

NEW limited-edition pink packaging SpongeTowels paper towels!

NEW London Naturals plant-based citrus dish detergent or dish soap!

NEW London Naturals plant-based unscented FREE AND CLEAN dish detergent or dish soap!

Walkers Shortbread Highland Oat Crackers!

Walkers Shortbread Three-Seed Oat Crackers!

Colgate MaxFresh Clean Mint toothpaste!

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Lizzie Borden hacker, common women's interests, Milk2Go chocolate strawberry

Sat, 22 Feb 2020 05:11:37 GMT

There was a 15-second fire alarm inspection today at 1:25. I told Hester's husband Ni that he needs to give people time to get to the fucking door since knocking constantly isn't going to HELP - it'll just make people feel RUSHED! I'm also DISABLED, so giving me a bit of extra time isn't going to KILL YOU!

From Julie: Do not accept a friend request from this woman, Lizzie Borden. She's a hacker.

From Cosmo in Shiva's Discord server, who says this comic strip is 100% me: Common women's interests like animals, makeup, and fashion? I don't want to go inside THOSE doors, but the one labelled TRUE CRIME is way more intriguing! "And that's how they dissolved the body!"

1% Milk2Go!

Chilling Chocolate Milk2Go!

Strawberry Splash Milk2Go!

Iced Coffee Milk2Go!

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February 15 is Cheap Candy Day! / Loving murder documentaries! / Lindt galore!

Sun, 16 Feb 2020 03:58:15 GMT

I noticed that Terrence unfriended me - okay, then! Went out at 3 on a 407 to London Drugs: I got on-sale Morris Gold chocolate coins, on-sale Lindt milk chocolate, on-sale Lindt assorted dark chocolate (60% and 70%), on-sale Lindt strawberries and cream chocolate truffles, on-sale NEW limited-edition Lindt Milk and White chocolate truffles for Valentine's Day, on-sale Febreze odor killer x2 (Tide / original), on-sale NEW Febreze air fresheners x3 (Bora Bora Waters / original with Gain / Linen and Sky), on-sale NEW Burt's Bees lip balm x2 (vanilla bean / wild cherry), NEW Rochef chocolate-covered dried cranberries / blueberries, one litre of Heinz ketchup, on-sale Plackers Micro Mint flossers in a 150 value pack, and on-sale NEW Nutter Butter fudge peanut butter cookie sandwiches. Was home by 4, which was fine by me! The Febreze things were to replace the ones I bought on October 9, 2018 when Jimmy disappeared AGAIN, probably to block people and talk to others. "Just sitting and taking care of Grandma and thinking in the rain," my ass!

From Holidays That Might Get Overlooked: Feb. 15! Don't even think about getting in between me and my half-price chocolate.

From Holidays That Might Get Overlooked: February 15 is Cheap Candy Day!

From Holidays That Might Get Overlooked: I can't wait for February 15! Otherwise known as 50% off Chocolate Day!

From Someecards and Twitter: Find someone who loves murder documentaries as much as you do. There's really nothing better than cuddling with your babe while watching stories about people having their head cut off with a steak knife.

Morris Gold Chocolate coins for Valentine's Day - European milk chocolate!

( Chocolate, Febreze, lip balm, and flossers! )

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Heart-shaped steak, a Nicolas Cage pillowcase, losing a Canucks game Grim Reaper

Tue, 11 Feb 2020 06:01:54 GMT

The Canucks played the Predators tonight at 7, and started off Sedin Week with a 6-2 WIN! Markus Naslund, Henrik and Daniel Sedin, Trevor Linden, and Stan Smyl were all in the building for Sedin Week! Pavel Bure also had a message!

From Julie: Most girls on Valentine's Day want roses, chocolate, jewelry, and lingerie. Me, I just want a heart-shaped steak!

A Nicolas Cage pillowcase which I sent to Julie once: See you in my dreams!

From Reddit and r/canucks: When Canucks lose the game and people say, "Don't be negative - go out and enjoy life," I cosplay as the Grim Reaper with a scythe instead.

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Starlight, Pennsylvania?! / Nichalse Laizure is Nicholas?! / Titiera Tucker?!

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 21:15:46 GMT

I discovered redrum today - UGH! Had to shower!

Julie M. was on vacation and saw this map at a Pennsylvania visitor centre: Starlight?! Makes me think of the Starlight casino around here!

From Julie M. and JUDGE JUDY: Nichalse Laizure?! Apparently, that is how you spell Nicholas... WTF? HORRIBLE SPELLING! It ALMOST reminds me of nachos, Pére Lachaise cemetery, and Azure Road!

From Julie M. and JUDGE JUDY: Titiera Tucker?! BOOBIES AND TIARAS!

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Haleigh Cummings?! BAD SPELLING! / Climax, Pennsylvania?! / Chicken Mr. Noodles!

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 07:29:51 GMT

Hahaha, Cummings and Climax are an orgasm coincidence or theme today!

From Reddit and r/UnresolvedMysteries: Haleigh Cummings?! BAD SPELLING OF HAILEY OR HALEY! It's the tenth anniversary on February 9 and February 10, too!

Climax, Pennsylvania?!

Mr. Noodles in chicken flavor!

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Unknowingly doing the biggest poo in the world every day!

Tue, 04 Feb 2020 20:30:44 GMT

It's snowing again! COFFEE TIME AND HOT CHOCOLATE TIME!

Every day, someone on Earth unknowingly does the biggest poo in the world for that day. Just some shit for you to think about.

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11 herbs and spices / Memories on stairs / Bunghole Liquors?! Hooker Cockram?!

Sun, 02 Feb 2020 03:52:56 GMT

COFFEE TIME! To my surprise, Andre (from Stryn, Norway) had reactivated his Facebook account for now to "stay in touch" with the Fearsome Canucks group, so I took advantage of it to untag / delete pics of him that I'd tagged. The Canucks played the Islanders today at 10 AM thanks to "lovely" East Coast scheduling, and won 4-3 in overtime despite the Islanders scoring with 35 seconds remaining in regulation! Quinn Hughes got two goals including the game-winner AND is currently now #1 in rookie scoring for this season!

Afterwards, I went out at 2:25 on a 401 to shop at London Drugs. I bought dark grey Designer Workshop washcloths x12, on-sale 12-pack Excel Gum x4 for my wallet (99 cents each for Chlorophyll / Strong Mint / Peppermint / Winterfresh), NEW on-sale dark chocolate Wild Coast Fruit blueberries and cranberries x2 for National Dark Chocolate Day today, Mackie's Potato Crisps haggis and black pepper / NEW crispy bacon chips x2, and on-sale Nescafe coffee in a tall canister, getting back at 3:35 on a 407.

From James: When someone says, "White people don't season their food," and then you hit them with 11 herbs and spices at KFC.

From Julie: We all have memories on stairs. Others have memories of a romantic kiss in the stairwell. I just have memories of falling down the stairs ungracefully!

From Julie and Anorak UK: Bunghole Liquors?! Hooker Cockram?!

Andre!

( Chips, gum, and new dark chocolate! )

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Ambrosia Jones?! / Rhythm Pacheco?! / Skeletal animal figurines: DRAGON!

Fri, 31 Jan 2020 04:04:17 GMT

A handyman came by unexpectedly at 12:30 with caulk to spackle my bathroom walls, which I'd mentioned to Hester last week. He also had noticed my shower tile apparently "needed" to be repaired too, which was fine by me, and he left by 1.

The bad bathroom wall is here:

From Julie and Beauty Insider: Ambrosia Jones?!

From Happiness Heroes: Rhythm Pacheco?! Reminds me of my Grade 7 teacher, Mrs. Pacheco.

From Julie: Skeletal animal figurines in DRAGON, unicorn, and mermaid!

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