glowing_dragon: (Default)
I was up at 7:30 AM, so it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


From Tyler A. and the Chive: Janice Keihanaikukauakahihiuliheekahaunaele?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Young Charles Cox?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Dr. Peter Power is in obstetrics and gynecology?!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
Some older guy by the hospital said that my San Francisco shirt was a "nice shirt." Cool!


From Tyler A. and the Chive: Ramit Inmah Ashol?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Paul Twocock?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: This old lady named ORAL was on a game show?! I've heard of Opal, but ORAL is way too much!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Harry Sidebottom?!




From Tyler A. and the Chive: Crystal Coker?!

glowing_dragon: (Cherry Cheesecake or Pie)
I was up at 7:55 AM today, so it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


My Facebook friends have liked my posts 74,000 times as of today!




Glee Ewell and the family were murdered on Easter Sunday?! It's pronounced "U-ull."

glowing_dragon: (Bubble Tea)
THIS ENTRY IS ALLOWED TO HAVE NON-ALIGNED TAGS.


I showered and did laundry today, a day earlier than I might have! However, I had to wipe a very watery bathroom floor with a mop and multiple (paper) towels, then had to do TWO loads of laundry on the THIRD floor, where one of the dryers was out of order! What stressful stramash! AIYA! I finally finished all the laundry just now at 7:30!


The FINAL FANTASY VI: THE ETERNAL CRYSTALS party (Gau, Sabin, Celes, and Strago) goes to visit the crazy old man. Aged Man: "Oh, hello again! Yep, you were tops!" Sabin: "That's why we..."




Jidoor fashion at its best! )
glowing_dragon: (Consumer Whore)
From Candy: The (Hard Knock) Life of a Facebook Photo! Brought to you by Pixable!


How did you take the picture? With a film camera: What a hipster. Ha! Now you have to get it developed! Don't get it digital: You can't tag people on prints! Get it digital: It's a 21st century thing. Ask somebody about it! LAPTOP!

How did you take the photo: With a digital camera: Do you even know where your cable is? Didn't find it yet. #FAIL

Do you even know where your cable is? FOUND IT! LAPTOP! Does the picture need to be edited? YES! Use (and abuse) the iPhoto enhance feature. Vignette Effect it too, if you're fancy like that.

Does the picture need to be edited? NO. Sure?

Does the picture need to be edited? Don't know how. (?) :/ Haha, guess you're stuck with red-eye!

How did you take the picture? With a phone! Did you hipstamatic / Instagram it? YES! Revel in how original and artistic you are. NO.

How did you take the picture: With an iPad. Do you realize how RIDICULOUS you look? YES! NO. Either way, you don't care, because you know everyone is jealous you have an iPad 2.

Upload Photos to Facebook! Insert a funny / witty caption and tag everybody: yourself and friends! The self-tagging analysis process: You look AWESOME. PROFILE PIC! You look okay. Tag yourself. You look TERRIBLE. DELETE!

Upload Photos to Facebook! The friend-tagging analysis process: They look better than you! Don't tag anyone. You all look okay, or they look TERRIBLE: Tag everyone!

Get likes!

Get a notification saying someone profiled your picture, Realize he or she cropped you out. Tag your hand as evidence of your presence. Consider defriending him or her... leave a snarky comment instead.

Get a notification saying someone profiled your picture. You're in it! LIKE it!

Immediately, half the people untag themselves. (seriously, are they ever not on Facebook?)

Get comments: "Ew! Gross! Take this down. NOW!" Take it down. :( End up with an album half the size you started with. Leave it anyway. Lose a friend, but enjoy everyone else's appreciation!

Get comments: "Awesome pic!" Pat yourself on the back...

And have the picture never be seen again... until one day, someone finds it on a Facebook stalking spree.

Designed by TheLuLab.com




Cody and Corey Manyshots?!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
From Tumblr: "Toxic monogamy culture"? REALLY?! Jealousy is normal, and commitment DOES mean exclusivity! Otherwise, how can you say that you romantically love someone AND are committed to them?!




Error message from Facebook a couple of weeks ago: Bad Request: E. Whatever, Facebook.




These special snowflakes decided not to assume their BABY'S gender, and decided that it would be the first person in BC to get a health card without a gender marker. If I asked a parent whether their baby was a boy or girl, and got the answer "I don't know yet," I would side-eye that person really hard. Also, Searyl Atli Doty?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
Chrissy refriended me again, so all is well on that front.


Fraser with the animal book I got him when he was in town last month!




My ex-friend David Emery!




My ex-friend Subena Schmidt!




From Janina: All in all, you're just another brick in the wall.




From Engrish.com: Chicken paws?!




From Julie: Khushwinder Singh?!




Rare item in FINAL FANTASY VI: THE ETERNAL CRYSTALS: Fish: A rotten fish.

glowing_dragon: (Crazy-Eyed Bear)
I discovered today that David Emery unfriended me on Facebook, which is fine.


Man accused of chasing family member with hatchet: Take a look at the guy's mugshot here! HAHAHA!




From Steph: A sign of things to come! A sign of NG things to come! MUHAHAHAHA!




From Julie: A comma with grammar books such as STYLE GUIDE, THE ART OF THE COMMA, COMMA 101, LET'S PUNCTUATE / THE RIGHT WAY / THE WRONG WAY / USAGE / COMMA FUN!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
While looking around for some stuff earlier today, I found a Christmas-themed envelope with Teunis's name on it, plus a Percy Jackson and Olympians: The Lightning Thief DVD box. I was going to throw those out, but decided to ask Andrew M. if Teunis might actually like it returned to him. I know how I'd feel if someone threw away my stuff, so I had to do that. Apparently, he does want them back, so we'll see how that goes.


Percy Jackson and Olympians: The Lightning Thief DVD box cover!




From my now ex-friend Daniel M.: LMNT-ology.com! Make any words out of elements in the periodic table!

Leslie!

Latinum: A rare silver liquid, often plated with gold, used as currency by the Ferengi Alliance. (STAR TREK)

Einsteinium: Identified in 1952 from the debris in the first large thermonuclear explosion. (Albert Einstein)

Lithium: The lightest of all metals - half the density of water. Discovered in 1817, and now used in batteries. (Greek LITHOS - stone)

Etherium: An extremely rare metal created by the sphinx Crucius the Mad. Vedalken wizards strive to infuse everything with etherium. (MAGIC: THE GATHERING)


In BOZOBOUND, Bozo / Paige / Robot stay overnight at the Monotoli Grand Hotel upon getting to New Pork. The next day's news headline in the FOURSIDE POST: "Over 70% of Fourside citizens support Monotoli."




In the BOZOBOUND version of Magicant, Bozo is an outline only. His mom, his sister Sharon, and his cat Smokey are in the background.

glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
From AMERICA'S DUMBEST CRIMINALS: A guy named Douglas Duncan robbed Dunkin' Donuts?! Bonus: His accomplice was named Howard Johnson!




From Janina: This gorilla is saying, "HUBERT! JASPER! I am not paying this man to take pictures of you two fooling around! Now sit still and behave!"




From Engrish.com and Library of Most Controversial Files: Sixi roasted husband!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Vanessa and When summer starts, my life is instantly better: A baby onesie that says, "Ah, good sir. I do believe I've shat in my pantaloons." The onesie also features a mustache!




From Laid-Back Corner: 1975 Led Zeppelin vs. 2012 Nicki Minaj?! Led Zeppelin's THANK YOU wins over Nicki Minaj's song about a stupid hoe EVERY TIME!




From Julie: There's an Indycar driver named Will Power?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
Uncle Andrew's office called me at 10:55 this morning - yes, next Tuesday at 4 should work just fine for once for my next dentist appointment with Sean!


From Ripley's Believe It Or Not on May 13, 2015: Jay and Kateri Schwandt have 13 sons in a row! Tyler, Zach, Drew, Brandon, Tommy, Vinnie, Calvin, Gave, Wesley, Charlie, Luke, Tucker, and now Francisco!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
I went out at 2:40 to get more on-sale President's Choice Blue Menu Six Bean Medley cans at Shoppers Drug Mart as long as they're still 99 cents! The pharmacist next door recognized me and waved at me, so we chatted briefly while waiting for the light to change. Yeah, Richmond smells like shit again today! I got six cans of beans, two on-sale Brookside dark chocolate bags (mango-mangosteen / pomegranate), eight 99-cent White Cheddar and Broccoli Sidekicks (all the available stock on the shelf like last time!), and an on-sale Speed Stick Irish Spring original deodorant before getting home at 3:25 on a 407.


Speed Stick deodorant with Irish Spring in Celtic Ice scent!




World of Flavors poutine chips!




From Janina and Whisper: It disgusts me every time I hear girls talk about how expensive they want their engagement rings to be. A man is offering his life to you, and you're worried about a hunk of carbon on a metal circle.




From Engrish.com and Library of Most Controversial Files: If you are stolen, call the police at once. This is from the Urban Mass Transportation Branch Shanghai Public Security Bureau.




From Reddit: Millie-Ribbon and Mollie-Ribbon Curtis are twins?! At least they were born on September 17, my birthday! HAHAHA!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
From Janina: Bob Barker on THE PRICE IS RIGHT says, "Parting gifts! We have a nice toaster for you, loser!"




From Engrish.com and Library of Most Controversial Files: A fire extinguisher labelled as a hand grenade?!




From my FAST-ACTING LONG-LASTING Bathroom Reader #18: Detroit police busted someone named Denise COKE with a lot of COCAINE in May 2005! How ironic!

glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
I once showed my ex-friend Laura C. this picture of arborio rice being used in mushroom risotto!




From Reddit and Robin Grille's HEART TO HEART PARENTING: Time and time again, children are heavily reprimanded for committing the offense of crying or being angry. Let's get this straight: emotions are not bad behavior. Emotions don't hurt anyone. Suppressing children's emotions on the other hand, DOES cause them harm. Over time, if done repeatedly, it unbalances their brain chemistry. It stresses their immune and digestive systems, and it undermines their ability to relate to others.

The headline is: "A little something that reminds me of how narcissists begin fucking their kids up early on."




From Lucas and Discord: The path to success is never take alone.




Jarome Iginla's full name is Jarome Arthur Adekunle Tig Junior Elvis Iginla?!

glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
I felt like I could finally take a shower tonight, so I did. :D

I'm definitely going to do my laundry in a bit, too. :D


From my FAST-ACTING LONG-LASTING Bathroom Reader #18: Awiey Hernandez and Huquan Gavin?!




From Jazmin: Hello Kitty! Goodbye Kitty! The hole is her butthole!




Written in ketchup and mustard: "We waited 30 minutes - NO SERVICE!"

glowing_dragon: (Default)
From Not Always Right: Keirran Maree?! Is that Karen or Kieran?




From Not Always Right: Leah de Jager?! JAGERMEISTER!




From Not Always Right: Eric Justice?! That's a cool last name!




From Not Always Right: Koshka Hellqvist?!




From Not Always Working: Icajunihy Usevoruna?! Does she LOVE Cajun food because it's in her name? :D Also, I suspect she's a furry...

glowing_dragon: (OMFG Yay!)
I had a headache today and had to abandon my Tomato Alfredo lunch in favor of a nap at 12. At least I felt better at 3! Then I got email: Jon thinks that there's a family dinner on Monday at their place. Apparently, there's going to be a lunch tomorrow at the lards' place with Steph, Lisa, and Fraser. I can't take that much family time! Gotta figure out when the FOOD STREAM is on Cuya's Twitch first!


From Julie: RAINY is a human name?!




Holden Johnson?!




From Youtube: Kenia Monge?! (pronounced "Kenya Mon-hey")




From Lucas and r/wewantplates: A huge sushi boat!

glowing_dragon: (Bert and Ernie)
I went out to vote today, at least.


From Krista: A red dragon guarding a spire from heroes!




From The Bleacher Report: Wolfgang Wolf?!




From Julie: Ted Yoho?! Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!




Anelisa Durham?! I see her parents tried to avoid "anal" in her name by not spelling it as Analisa, but you can still hear it when you say the name. Yuck!

glowing_dragon: (Bert and Ernie)
Jack Bauer on 24's LIVE ANOTHER DAY on May 5, 2014: DAMMIT, CHLOE!




From The Bleacher Report: Sonny Sixkiller?!




From The Bleacher Report: Neville Neville?!




From The Bleacher Report: Tommy Gunn?!




From The Bleacher Report: Rabbit Maranville?!

glowing_dragon: (Bubble Tea)
From a Not Always Right story on furries titled FLURRIES OF FURRIES: Zepharius Lowell?!




From The Bleacher Report: Tim Bikakabutuka?!




From The Bleacher Report: Vander Blue?!




From The Bleacher Report: Will Barrow?! (wheelbarrow)




Oil Can Boyd?!

glowing_dragon: (the REJECTED icon)
It was COFFEE TIME at 7-8 AM!


From Buzzfeed: PRINCE OF DOGS?!




From Julie: Toy Powell?! I always thought Toy was more of a dog name than anything...




From Reddit: COOKING WITH A SERIAL KILLER?! Recipes from Dorothea Puente!




From Alice: CYLE Larsen and LYLE Larsen (from Edmonton) are twin sex offender brothers with very bad names. Why spell Kyle with a C?! Why give twins RHYMING names?!

glowing_dragon: (DarkEyedWolf... sex!)
From Buzzfeed: DOUBLE PENETRATOR?!




From Matthew Santoro: Sergey Tuganov dropped dead after sex and a bottle of Viagra?!

glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
I saw a dog-related post in CRIME INC. on Facebook, so of course I asked why it was there. They deleted my CRIME-RELATED Youtube playlist of CRIMINALLY LISTED videos on the 13th, yet that dog post (and numerous other non-crime posts about people's work and personal lives) stays up?! If I'd known THAT was going to happen, I wouldn't have bothered being polite. I'd have said, "WHY THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT IN HERE?!" Seriously, people. WHY THE FUCK IS THE MODDING SO BLOODY INCONSISTENT?! I wouldn't be surprised if they were all personal friends or something! Now I wonder why the fuck Shelley is in the group. DO NOT JOIN THE GROUP!


From This Is True: Aaron Jerome Megatron?!




From Julie: JERALYNN and Jeremiah got married in Lancaster, Pennsylvania?! Wow, and I thought Warren Tam and Lauren Chan were bad for rhyming names back in 2002...

glowing_dragon: (Consumer Whore)
From Julie: Cosmas Curry?!




From Janina: If you didn't get "Luck Be In The Air Tonight" on this WHEEL OF FORTUNE puzzle, the Internet has probably ruined you.




From Buzzfeed: GANGSTA RAP COLORING BOOK?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: Steve Bear is an Angeles National Forest ranger?!




From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: John Argue was trained as a lawyer?!

glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
From Instagram: The Lakewood Springs Homeowners Association has an ANAL Egg Hunt which is a FREE FAMILY EVENT?!




From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: George Crook is a lawyer?!




From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: Daniel Waters and Norman Powers worked for the Department of Water and Power in Los Angeles?!

glowing_dragon: (French Toast)
In COLINBOUND 1, Colin and Madam Hex have to defeat four RCMP officers at the Selkirk police station so the path to Lockport can be unblocked. When they turn back to normal, they drop Doughnuts, hahaha!




On their way to Red River from Lockport in COLINBOUND 1, Colin and Madam Hex see this smiley face blocking the path to a working bridge. "What the hell?! There's a giant smiley face in your way." Joe will invent a Smiley Smasher to take care of that problem, thank goodness!




From ALL-PURPOSE BATHROOM READER #13: Harry Hollywood was a police officer in the Los Angeles Police Department?!

glowing_dragon: (No Netspeak!)
Ayler called me again at 12:50 to ask what time I'd be eating lunch and what time I'd be finished eating, so I told him that I'd be eating pasta at 1:30, but I'd have to make it first. Then Hiero said that he'd had a pink and white and red cupcake today: nice! Harmony said that the kids liked calling people to chat, even if they were eating lunch at the time. Cute and reasonable!


From Ripley's Believe It Or Not: A New Jersey man named Thomas BACON was arrested in an assault about SAUSAGE!




Broccoli: "I am a broccoli and I look like a tree!" Walnut: "I am a walnut and I look like a brain!" Mushroom: "I am a mushroom and I HATE THIS GAME!"

glowing_dragon: (Bubble Tea)
THIS ENTRY IS ALLOWED TO HAVE NON-ALIGNED TAGS.


I got most of these from The Blog of Funny Names!


Su'a Cravens?!




Leonte Carroo, Cody Whitehair, Briean Boddy-Calhoun, Charone Peake, Germain Ifedi, Bronson Kaufusi, Pharoh Cooper, Fahn Cooper, Rees Odhiambo, Ezekiel Elliott, Laquon Treadwell, Xavien Howard, Tyreek Hill )
glowing_dragon: (LJ Drama)
THIS ENTRY IS ALLOWED TO HAVE NON-ALIGNED TAGS.


I got most of these from The Blog of Funny Names!


Xavier Su'a-Filo?!




Jeremiah Attaochu, Loucheiz Purifoy, Xavier Grimble, Kony Ealy, Cyrus Kouandjio, Ego Ferguson, IK Enemkpali, Odell Beckham, Khalil Mack )

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