glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
COFFEE TIME! Christon sent me an Evite to a potluck-style Sunday birthday dinner for him and Jeremy, which I automatically RSVPed to without checking the date. Now I have, and it's October 1 - no hockey conflicts! Maybe I'll just pick up a cake from Buy-Low for the Gwei-Loh right before dinner. The Canucks had Pre-Season Game #4 against the Kings today in SHANGHAI at 4:30 AM, and lost 5-2.


After Walse Tower (AKA Bill and Ben's Playhouse) sinks in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF, Syldra comes in to save the day for Bartz / Lenna / Galuf / Faris! Only her name is Beano in the spoof, and he seemingly comes from another planet... "No, Bartz! Beano wasn't trying to eat us! He... saved us!"




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it back to Castle Walse in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. This castle guard says, "During the king's battle with HeavyP, a man was violently expelled from the creature's ass."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it back to Castle Walse in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. This castle guard says, "He was apparently in there for about 50 years, living as a sort of human tapeworm."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it back to Castle Walse in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF, where the king has killed himself after the events in Bill and Ben's Playhouse. The party comes across this soldier in bed. "I've been living in a monster's intestines for 50 years. Go figure. I can finally eat real food again."

glowing_dragon: (Vancouver Canucks hockey!)
Eric T. posted this on his Facebook page in 2011: Crazy Canuck Drive in Whistler, BC!




Bartz and Lenna are at the Tycoon Meteor at the start of FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. He tells her, "My name is Ass-Monkey 3000, but my friends call me Bartz for short."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it to Castle Walse's jail in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. This guy says, "I was locked up for liking Enix more than Square... DRAGON QUEST rules!!"

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "Lord Galuf dropped a deuce in my toilet the other day, and I'm still working on plunging the thing."




At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "I swear he shit a whole moogle. Yeah, I'm pretty pissed off about it."




At Bal Castle, Cara wants to go on the hiryuu dragon to rescue the FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party from Moogle Forest. This soldier puts up only token resistance. "So I don't mind depriving him of food for the time being."

glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)



"Your Wine is Cabernet"




You are a resilient and successful person. You have a lot of willpower, and you are more resistant to stress than most people.
You truly appreciate the finer things in life. You are always on a hunt for the best; second place is a disappointment.

You have a strong sense of self, but it's not off-putting. You are well-mannered and can engage anyone.
You could have been very successful taking the traditional route in life, but instead, you've chosen to forge your own path.







Galuf in Tzepish's Castle: "I call out to you... Yog-Sothoth! Master of all that is dark and unholy!!" Bartz: "GALUF?!"




Ninja Wolf to Happy Wolf, Grumpy Wolf, Dopey Wolf, and Doc Wolf: "Oh, I am certainly going to die now. I was a fool not to seek medical aid after losing both legs and five quarts of blood..."




Ninja dojo students! )
glowing_dragon: (Crazy-Eyed Bear)
This morning, it was time to put my shorts away and put another blanket on the bed. Then Jon decided to act like an entitled person, thinking that I could just bus to Commercial Drive from Richmond on my birthday, and threatening me that the kids wouldn't be there if I insisted that the dinner be at 6. Like, do they bug and bully and manipulate Harmony's side of the family into starting dinners at that early hour?! I'm about to cancel this whole idea of a "family" birthday dinner!


Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris finally make it to Jachol in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. They meet this old man: "Welcome to Jachol, the town with the name that sounds too much like JACK HOLE to be a coincidence."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris finally make it to the Jachol Cave in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. They open this chest to get the Thunder Whip, then decide to check it again. "There's a note inside... The great thief, Lonely Wolf, was here!" This is what happens if you let Lonely Wolf out of the jail in Walse Castle!




SEATH Jackson?! If it's pronounced as SETH anyway, why have the extra letter?!

glowing_dragon: (Default)
After some procrastination, I finally sent out an email and Facebook event invitations to my Level 41 Birthday Extravaganza on Sept. 24! I also got back to FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF after a six-week hiatus!


Here's a giant rubber ducky under Tower Bridge in London!




From The Devil's Panties: This Sandwich of Consent comic from August 4 reminds me of how SOME people act on the Internet. "Ew! I HATE hot dogs!" "Okay, cool. I wasn't going to share mine with you." "NO ONE should get a hot dog because I don't like them!" "But I LOVE hot dogs." THE SANDWICH OF CONSENT!




From Julie: Tierni Martins?! That is not a good way to spell TIERNEY!

glowing_dragon: (OMFG Yay!)
Since I got up at 8 AM, it was COFFEE TIME! I later showered and did laundry.





"You Should Wear Brown Sunglasses"




You are very down to earth, and your fashion choices are very classic. You don't mind paying more for quality pieces.
You are smart and savvy. You wear sunglasses not only to complete your look, but also to protect your eyes.

You always know how to dress for the occasion. Fashion for you is more like camouflage - you want people to focus on your other qualities.
You pick clothes that are comfortable and a perfect fit. You may look dressed up, but you're as comfy as can be!







Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it to Karnak and the Fire-Powered Ship in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. This soldier says, "Entry is not permitted. If you were to enter now, it would seriously mess with the game's chronology."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it to Karnak and the Fire-Powered Ship in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. This soldier says, "Events were designed to follow a certain order."

glowing_dragon: (Bert and Ernie)
Today is National Smores Day!


Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris make it to Castle Tycoon in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. They meet the tutor Jenica, who can be in two places at once. "Sarisa was Lenna's older sister. At a young age, she killed her mother and disappeared forever."




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris get out of jail in Karnak Castle in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF, and can now explore. This guard says, "I can speak Al Bhed! Oui zicd fycdat ouin desa muugehk drec ib!" Nice reference to FINAL FANTASY X and FINAL FANTASY X-2!




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris go around Karnak in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF after Karnak Castle explodes and Queen Karnak dies from snorting "black crack", AKA gunpowder. They meet this guy at the pub. "Did anyone notice that FF9's IMMORAL MELODY and FF5's INTENSION OF THE EARTH are a little more than similar?"




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris go around Karnak in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF after Karnak Castle explodes and Queen Karnak dies from snorting "black crack", AKA gunpowder. They go to the pub and meet this guy. "Speaking of which, see if you can spot the similarities in FF10's SEYMOUR BATTLE theme and FF9's ASSAULT OF THE WHITE DRAGONS!"




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris go around Karnak in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF after Karnak Castle explodes and Queen Karnak dies from snorting "black crack", AKA gunpowder. They meet this guy in his house. "I AM ERROR." Nice ZELDA reference!

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF screenshot collage #1: Lenna to her father King Tycoon: "Off to the crack-house again?" Captain Faris: "I just dropped a load... in my pants..." Boco the Chocobo: "Yeah, you best be getting your fat ass off me, biatch!" Lenna to Bartz: "I supoose you'll want me to repay you with sexual favors..."

Lenna: "It's been fun, but I've really gotta go. There's probably a long line of hooligans at my corner..." Boco: "Damn it, Bartz... I hate you." Boco: "Man, honestly... Bartz is gay or something." Bartz: "Ahhh... Piss water!"




Version 0.21 is more offensive than Version 1.01! )
glowing_dragon: (Default)
Today is Bastille Day!


From Krista: Black dragon breathing fire!




The FINAL FANTASY V Spoof Version 1.01 title screen!




From Reddit: Kamala Harris?! Makes me think of camels!

glowing_dragon: (Devilish Smile)
Hester dropped by at 8:25 (after being VERY impatient when I didn't answer her knocking in two seconds) to inform me how lucky I was: I'm getting a new fridge / freezer tomorrow! She told her supervisors about it, and it took less than a week! I should have told her about it in May when I noticed something, but I didn't think it was great. Then I took a shower later on.


My ex-friend Marko Velimir Kobak, who's a Leafs fan!




Nail Railovich Yakupov?! I think the patronymic is cool enough, though.




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris go to the town of Tule in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. Being a pirate, Faris ditches the party in order to go drinking in the pub. Everyone else goes to the pub after doing some exploring and shopping. They go upstairs to find Faris asleep in a room. Bartz and Galuf go in separately, and then fall in love with Faris. who comes out and says: "What's with the hearts? Come on, guys, Lenna isn't THAT cute!"




Bartz, Lenna, Galuf, and Faris go to the town of Tule in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF. Being a pirate, Faris ditches the party in order to go drinking in the pub. Everyone else goes to the pub after doing some exploring and shopping. They go upstairs to find Faris asleep in a room. Bartz and Galuf go in separately, and then fall in love with Faris. Lenna then says, "I think these hearts are for you, Faris."

glowing_dragon: (Consumer Whore)
I went out to the Bay at 3:15 on a 407 for a new 3-pack of Jockey underwear in size 9 (last bought on November 15, 2016) since I needed some partly because of the other day. Thank goodness for extra money in my bank account! Then I went to London Drugs to get Tasty Bite basmati rice and some Arroy-D green curry to go with it, bulk Always pads, 400 index cards, on-sale Guacachips, on-sale Salsitas chips, NEW on-sale Paqui tortilla chips in Grilled Habanero / Cool Salsa Verde flavors, and an on-sale replacement $2 dark blue washcloth. I was surprised when I got home at only 4:25 on another 407!


NEW Paqui tortilla chips: Grilled Habanero!




NEW Paqui tortilla chips: Cool Salsa Verde!




Bartz, Lenna, Faris, and Galuf finally get to Bal Castle from the Forest of Moore thanks to Krile's wind drake. The first three are very surprised to learn that Galuf is actually a king! Bartz: "Eh? I thought you were just some crazy old man - you never said anything about being a king!"




Bartz: "Just kidding! I'd just better mind my P's and Q's around you... King Galuf."




Galuf: "Listen up - before you knew me as a king, you knew me as a friend. Just "Galuf" is fine."




Bartz: "Understood, Just Galuf!"




Galuf: "... Don't push it, kid. Here in Bal, bad jokes like that will get you PUNished..."

glowing_dragon: (Cherry Cheesecake or Pie)
From Krista: Attacking flying green dragon!




From my ex-friend Lucas's Discord: The dilemma of blowing out candles when you're a fire-breathing dragon...




The FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party stays overnight at Tycoon Castle after seeing the Ruined City rise up in the sky. Faris tells Lenna, "The next morning, I killed my mother in her bed. I drenched her in buckets and buckets of urine I had been saving for months."




The FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF party stays overnight at Tycoon Castle after seeing the Ruined City rise up in the sky. Lenna tells Faris, "My mother was also drowned in buckets of urine! What an odd coincidence!"

glowing_dragon: (Crazy-Eyed Bear)
Last night, I finished uploading all my 2600 Bad and Unique Baby Names photos to Imgur in seven albums! I was up at 6:55 AM, so it was COFFEE TIME BY DEFAULT!


Imgur Bad and Unique Baby Names Albums!

http://imgur.com/a/w0quF (Awkward Wedding Name Combos!)

http://imgur.com/a/AD2Bo (Bad and Unique Baby Names 1!)

http://imgur.com/a/HHLsm (Bad and Unique Baby Names 2!)

http://imgur.com/a/0MFPx (Bad and Unique Baby Names 3!)

http://imgur.com/a/W2R79 (Bad and Unique Baby Names 4!)

http://imgur.com/a/vIsmo (Bad and Unique Baby Names 5!)

http://imgur.com/a/9PPmJ (Bad and Unique Baby Names 6!)

http://imgur.com/a/q651q (Bad and Unique Baby Names 7!)


The Knight job in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF: "Pussy in armor. Somewhat honorable."




The Brawler job in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF: "Brawlers love to bust skulls, but who doesn't?"




The Klepto job in FINAL FANTASY V SPOOF: "Can't keep his hands in his pockets."




Dragoon, Ninja, Samurai, Celtic, Hunter, SOM Mage, Churchy, Mexican, Time Mage, Trainer, Monster, Not Sure, Zoophile, Junkie, Hippie, Bard, Raver, Mime, Jobless )
glowing_dragon: (Bert and Ernie)
BOYS: Abijah Edwin, Algernon Angell James, Anchor Thomas (Carrier), Aquilla Cornelius, Arthur Nehemiah, Augustus Adalbert Evelyn, Carnavon Lewis, Charles Hercules Mylz, Clarence Alured, Demas Joseph, Edinborough, Enos Ezra, Epiphany Cole Grose, Fitzroy Chichester, Foxcrowle Percival, Fray Mohawk, Galenus George, Granville Montague, Homer Christopher, Hophni Phinehas, Lockett Frederick, Lothian Treble, Lyttleton Vernon, Miles Matthias, Moreton Heber Augustus, Newton Jarvis, Not Wanted James, Octavius Scarlett (Vale), Orr Cox, Publius John, Redemption, Senior Ramsey, St. Clare Nathaniel Henry, Tatton Lane Fox, Telemachus, Tempest Simeon, Thurto Joseph, Torlogh Eoghain, Wickliff Whitfield Wesley John, Young Harry, Zenas (Spaceman).

GIRLS: Adria Eliza Dulcibella, Agnes Dido, Albina Zingra Tryphosia, Amelia Alida Blanche, Amy Hannah Louisa Margaretta Beatrice Amelia, Arsene Lucie Magdeleine, Arthurina, Avarina Anne, Balaclava Elizabeth, Benjhannah Emma Thaletta, Bethelina Emma, Cassandra Gerlinda, Celicia Hannah, Charlotte Brontë, Clara Parthenia, Comfort Clara, Deliverance Dorcas, Dionysia Louisa, Dulcibella Sophia Paulina, Drusilla Hephzibah, Edwardine Pauline Clara, Elizabeth Hymenaea Caroline, Ella Nehustha, Ethelinda Violetta Elizabeth, Eudora Avice, Fulleretta Elizabeth Neslen, Juno Priscilla, Katherine Mia Hilda Adelaide, Leoline Teresita Heloiser Marietta, Lovely Alice, Marling Susan, Mary Alissima, Mary Christmas (Bond), Monica Alphonsa, Neva Amelia, Nurcellia Elizabeth, Ocean Emily, Philadelphia Lois, Phoras Rosina, Princess Alice, Shepherdess Mary, Velebeth Ann, Vity Ellen, Welly Clarissa Ivanna, Whelmot Elizabeth Pippen, Zamora, Zebe Rebecca, Zitella.

glowing_dragon: (Poop)
From Vanessa and When summer starts, my life is instantly better: A baby onesie that says, "Ah, good sir. I do believe I've shat in my pantaloons." The onesie also features a mustache!




From Laid-Back Corner: 1975 Led Zeppelin vs. 2012 Nicki Minaj?! Led Zeppelin's THANK YOU wins over Nicki Minaj's song about a stupid hoe EVERY TIME!




From Julie: There's an Indycar driver named Will Power?!

glowing_dragon: (OMFG Yay!)
Oh man... this was a good game! Now I'm off to play other dungeons or (more likely) Sam and Max, which Corey assures me has a "save" feature / menu at F5.

Scrolls exploding in pillars of flame = loss of 10HP
Potions tasting foul = loss of 5HP
Potions making you feel better = gaining 10HP
Feeling blessed at altars while you pray = gaining 10HP
Bolts of lightning that strike you while you pray = losing 10 HP
It's possible to be killed by the wrath of gods at altars, by burning scrolls, and by tainted potions!


I escaped from the Dungeon of Glowing Dragon!

I killed Harryroberts the arch-demon, Lilaznffairy421 the nymph, Imthjckaz the nymph, Sarala the giant spider, Dot Com the troll, Genkobar the fire elemental, Theferrett the mind flayer, Dwcorey the leprechaun, Urbad2 the dragon, Handofme the floating eye, Theonewhospeaks the dragon, Politzania the kobold, Supermary the leprechaun, Thefirestarter the troll, Winterlion the rat, Astrotre the goblin, Korczyk the nymph, Omni Sinrilus the owlbear, Hostis Leti the rat, Tehgreenfairy the arch-demon, Fate Envies Us the kobold, Hitman2682 the mind flayer, Diet Coke the zombie, Geordiecat76 the rat, Canucks94 the gelatinous cube, Sexnseafoam the zombie, Harlicat the zombie, Chibongo the fire elemental, Yogaclass4cats the floating eye, Lemahtnoze the floating eye, and Windritual the orc.

I looted the Crown of Lazeesod, the Crown of Notwellknown, the Axe of Mentalrant, the Armour of Twins, the Sword of Emoduckie, the Axe of Royalty, the Sword of Weatherguy80, the Dagger of Wonton Mein, the Shield of Computers, the Crown of Nezmet, the Armour of Dreamer , the Amulet of Pinkfloyd63, the Armour of Rubarabadom, the Crown of Chibi Blackie, the Sceptre of Rudezombie, a Figurine of Lusea, the Dagger of Eyeheartnewlife, the Axe of Lackofendorphin, the Amulet of Angelictorment, and 700 gold pieces.

Score: 1125

Explore the Dungeon of Glowing Dragon and try to beat this score,
or enter your username to generate and explore your own dungeon...

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glowing_dragon: (Default)
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